Empowering Desires

I went on a very enlightening retreat in the first week of March. One of my issues was that I felt I had no motivation in the last two years.

I remember a period in my life when I had no free time but didn’t feel tired. This was because I knew what I wanted and how to get it. Everything came so easily for me. There were even times when events favored my circumstances without conscious effort on my part.

In the retreat, I complained that I want to aspire for a goal but can’t see anything worth my time and energy. My wise retreat master told me that it could be because I don’t want to get disappointed at this point in my life. It struck me right at the core.

She gave me three activities that guided me to set worthwhile goals.

1. The power of imagination
   This is simply seeing in my mind how I want the future to look like. It could be as simple as lying down on a blanket in a wide open field with cool breeze all around. I could be there contentedly assessing the circumstances of my life.

2. Listing my goals
   This entails drawing a heart and putting in it a list of all the things that would truly make me happy. I was surprised to find out that the things I really hoped for are not that many and are actually easy to achieve.

3. Envisioning the future
   This requires writing a letter to the person I am most comfortable with dated in the future, preferably around 10 years from now, looking back. In my case, this is my best friend. I told my best friend my status in life by then, the things that kept me busy in that time frame.

After I accomplished all three, I had a new perspective in life. I had a long-term goal and was able to formulate plans on how to achieve them. I discovered the desires that gave me direction, motivated and empowered me.

Ask and You Shall Receive

Below is the homily shared by Fr. Rafael at the PGP Chapel of DLSU in October 6, 2005. The Gospel was Luke 11:5-13. Part of the Gospel was “Ask and you shall receive...” Fr. Rafael writes his homilies in a diary.

There was a time in my life when I could not believe what I just read:

“Ask and you shall receive.”

I prayed fervently but I didn’t get what I asked for. I knocked and I found nothing but a closed door. I was really disappointed and I didn’t want to pray anymore as well as attend masses. Why am I here saying this mass? It is because God didn’t answer my prayers.

If God gave me the beautiful girl I asked to be my wife, I will not be here.

If He gave me the opportunity to continue my engineering course abroad, I will not be here.

If He didn’t allow me to experience many unfortunate events and failures, I will not be here.

This means God knows better than I know what is best for me. Of course, what is best is His plan of providing a shepherd for His flock.

I realized that many of my prayers are selfish prayers. I found out that St. James was right. He said in his letter James 4:2-3:

“You cannot get what you want because you didn’t pray. But even when you do pray, your prayers are not answered because you pray/ask for selfish reasons.”

Then how should I pray? What should I ask for? I will pray a prayer asking and asking, seeking and knocking but let God decide what is best for me and His plans. Jesus says:

“If you who are wicked know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your heavenly Father give good things to those who ask Him?”

So keep on asking and praying. But if the answer is “No”, never be upset. God has another good plan. Don’t hang up, just hang on.

I asked God to take away my habit.
God said no. It is not for Me to take it away
but for you to give it up.

I asked God to grant me patience.
God said no. Patience is a by-product of tribulations
It isn’t granted. It is learned.

I asked God to give me happiness.
God said no. I give you blessings.
Happiness is up to you.

I asked God to spare me pain. God said no.
Suffering and pains draw you closer to Me.

I asked God for all things that I might enjoy life.
God said no. I give you life so you can enjoy all things.

Living in the Future

Most of us believe that we are molded by our past. However, in most cases, we live in the FUTURE.

For example, a professional is going on a 2-week vacation after working for 6 straight months. The week prior to the vacation itself, she is doing her job happily, preparing to leave everything in order. Her happy disposition is observed by her office mates. They all comment that she is so easy to work with, at her best element, even. She replies that she is looking forward to her vacation away from the pressures of everyday city life.

What kept her going the week prior to her vacation was the thought that she would spend 2 whole weeks in a tourist destination. For 2 whole weeks, she could get up at the time she wanted to, do all the things she always wanted to do but never had the time, and spend the all time she wanted to with people she liked. She was, in fact, living in the FUTURE.

The first week of her vacation was as she dreamed, planned and imagined. Her face glowed with joy.

All of this changed as she was into the second week of her vacation. Every now and then, she would remember her stressful city life, i.e., waking up before the sun rises, resignedly waiting to reach the office during the morning rush hour, dealing with difficult clients, and the list goes on. She was actually gloomy 3 days prior to going back to the office. Again, in the last 3 days of her vacation, she was living in the FUTURE.

Another example of this is the person who had been unintentionally offended by a friend. The person might think that things would happen again and opt to distance herself from the concerned person. A classic example of living in the future.

This goes without saying that we should learn from our mistakes and those committed by people around us. The trick is knowing how to wittingly balance being cautious and LIVING IN THE FUTURE.

Letting Go… Emptying

We’ve heard it all before. Whenever the New Year comes, we should let go of all of the negativities we have in our hearts. This is so we can have a fresh start. What surprised me was the homily of the priest in the New Year’s mass I attended.

He said that we should also let of ALL of the GOOD things that happened to us in the past year. He mentioned that if we rest on our laurels, so to speak, we would tend to lay back and stop aiming to achieve something better. Should we hold on to the good things in our life, we would hinder our growth process and never reach our full potentials. It makes sense right?

This weekend, I heard a further improvement on this concept. It is not enough that we let go of the bad AND the GOOD things, we should also EMPTY ourselves time and again.

If we empty ourselves from time to time, we become receptive to fresh ideas. If we empty ourselves, we leave more room for improvement. If we empty ourselves, we leave ourselves open to have our inner viewpoint be rearranged.