Yeah, I know I promised myself the global warming article two entries ago but haven't found the right article yet. Still, I found a comprehensive site which I included in my favorite links so that is okay with me now... :D
In my last post I mentioned that I was concerned my capacity to help my loved ones in financial ways will soon be taken away from me if I always have unplanned expenses due to family concerns. Hmmm.... I noticed that lately, all my worries are more real than before :)
Going back, the cliche which I am reminded of is that you receive more when you give... or something like that. I got my weekly salary and a small amount of allowance in two days' time! I know. Logical people will say that these are money that I have due coming (actually, one amount is delayed by 5 days). I should be mad more than really glad. Well, what can I say. These two amounts came at a very opportune time.
I am in between having given away money that I know will never come back and money that I should always expect coming. This entry is really going around in circles. My sentiment is just that I could give a small amount to the people who need my help at the moment and still be assured that I will be well-provided for by my job which, thankfully, pays well.
I better shut down this beloved overworked laptop of mine which is barely a month hence my over fondness for it and sleep so my random thoughts will stop tonight and I will be able to think clearly and logically tomorrow.
Monday, April 16, 2007
Saturday, April 14, 2007
The Official Start of Summer '07
I know I said my next blog will be about global warming. That was because I thought my life would be as uneventful as most of the times. Oh well, this entry proves me wrong.
"No more classes... no more books... no more teachers' dirty looks... summer time... summer time..."
This is the only Elmer Fudd quote I distinctly remember from Looney Tunes' Bugs Bunny cartoons. This is my exact sentiment now that I have already submitted the required papers and I actually have time to spend with friends simply to relax.
Surprisingly, I finished my work load for the day around 4:00 pm Thursday. I at once called my best friend and told her we should have dinner. We haven't seen each other and talked long on the phone for over a month!
She waited for me patiently in a fastfood near her office. We had dinner and coffee for over three hours. Believe me, there were no dead spots while we were eating. We would have gone on forever if not for the restriction that she had more than an hour's travel time to go home and we were also exhausted by office deadlines. It was so much fun simply hanging out.
Tuesday last week, a classmate and I planned a gimmick. We chatted online one time and wished just to hang out with each other on a Friday night. This is because from January-March this year, we had 8:00 am Saturday classes. So for three whole months, we were deprived of Friday night gimmicks just so we could be in class on time. I don't want to dwell on that unpleasant past so moving on to what happened yesterday, Friday.
I am beginning to think of why I thought I could plan after office Friday activities. For three consecutive Fridays, office work load was easy until 4:00 pm when we had "mini office crises." That meant leaving office at 7:00 pm when I planned of spending relaxing Friday nights.
Yesterday, around 10:00 am, my officemate asked what I was doing. I told him I was writing an article for the Annual Report. He asked me to prepare press kits as they are hosting a press conference. I willingly obliged because I thought I could work quietly after they left. Then, my boss passed me by and asked me to go with them. The event dragged on forever. I told my officemates I had some scheduled functions to attend and they let me go before the event ended.
I went home to get my gift to attend my niece's Fourth Birthday Party. The traffic was impossible so I wasn't able to attend it anyway.
Then my classmate picked me up so we could go to our gimmick. So there we were, six classmates. It was so much fun. We went to the dampa in Macapagal Avenue and went through the whole experience, from shopping in the wet market, to dining in my classmate's cozy little restaurant. The dinner lasted till 10:30. It was full of classroom stories, plenty of food and laughter.
After that, we had coffee in Sofitel Philippine Plaza's lobby where we took our shoes off and sat/lied on the couch without care for how we looked. We talked about serious boy-girl matters, specifically, how we single ladies could attract the right types of guys. We separated at 1:00 am full of plans for more gimmicks, hope for the future and happy memories. It was a perfect night.
This morning, I woke up and read a text message from my sister-in-law. She had a family concern and I thought of ways on how to help her. It was a good thing that we were able to ease her mind. In times like this, I feel blest that I am able to extend a helping hand to the people I love most. In spite of that happy thought, I am also concerned that my capacity to help her in financial ways only will soon be taken away from me too if I always have unplanned expenses like these.
Today, simply put, I spent the whole day sleeping. Believe me, that is no exaggeration. I felt that I was deprived of sleep because of January to March 8:00 am classes. I planned to wash my clothes because I am going on vacation next week with friends. That plan remains a plan at the time i am writing this entry.
Tonight, I will go to my aunt's house to send my tito back to the US. He was so nice, he gave me more than enough pasalubong when he came. Whatever happens tomorrow, Sunday, I know I am ready to take on all the office stresses and work load they will give me. After all, I have a gimmick to look forward to again.
Friday, April 13, 2007
AsiaWeek June 27, 1997 Cover Story
The last article I posted was about Philippine Brain Drain. This time, it's the singlehood trend in Asia way back in 1997. (I think this article is still true now).
I have decided to post an article about global warming in my next entry. For now...
It seems that me and my single unattached women friends are not trendsetters at all. It makes me think of why and how long the Asia Week, no less, observed this social (?) truth.
(Source: http://www.asiaweek.com/asiaweek/97/0627/cs1.html)
WHY WOMEN STAY SINGLE
The best and brightest are snubbing men, marriage and baby-making for work, fun and adventure. Should Asia be worried?
By Susan Berfield
HENRIETTA CLAUDIA "BONJIN" BOLINAO, a 40-something who runs her own public-relations firm, was planning to get married -- just as soon as she could find the time. First she had to help produce a book, The Philippines: A Journey through the Archipelago. Then her firm won two prestigious accounts, carmakers Volvo and UMC Nissan, and that kept her busy. She also decided to redecorate her apartment, improve her golf game, travel around the world and spend more time meditating. Her fiancé, a writer in Manila three years her junior, didn't seem too perturbed by the delays. As any sensible woman would, she considered that a warning sign. He was "a good guy, with a thinking mind," Bolinao says. Even her mother liked him. But maybe, she thought, he was scared to settle down. Or maybe, her friends thought, he was worried that she wouldn't.
Bolinao reviewed the situation: "He let me pursue my career and saw me through hard times when I set up my company. But at the same time he expected me to assume the role of the traditional Filipina woman. I was supposed to make sure everything was spic and span at home, be the perfect cook and ironing lady -- he even taught me how to iron properly. That whole thing can get really tiring." Bolinao and her fiancé eventually called off the wedding. "I really think we are soul mates. But we are better off as friends," she says now, two years later. "I will always love him. But I don't know about getting married."
For Bolinao, and women like her throughout Asia, marriage is not the first priority in life. Nor is it the last resort, the only way to secure a home and place in society. Marriage, for some, has become almost an alternative lifestyle: it is a choice, not a necessity. The majority will one day wed, but they will do so on their terms. Single women don't all put marriage -- and childbearing -- at the end of their list of things-to-do. Some are dating, some waiting to meet their destiny in a taxi queue. Others try their luck with the personals. But few of these single women -- or at least fewer than men might imagine -- are laying awake at night worrying about finding a suitable match. "A man for me is a bonus, like winning the lottery," Bolinao says. "With or without a man, I am fulfilled."
These single women have a few things in common: a high degree of educational and professional success, financial security, ambition and pride. For them being single at age 30, or 35, or older, is not a stigma; it's a status symbol. Some might even call it chic. They work hard. They travel. They are independent. These women won't settle for men who don't inspire them or nurture their aspirations. A good husband, they say, can keep pace with his wife without stepping on her toes. These are women who are used to having their own space. They want a man with maturity, not just money; someone who will be a companion, not a guardian.
These women are quick to add that those kind of men are scarce. Or already spoken for. Some suggest that it's not even worth looking, given that too few marriages succeed. "If I were starting all over again, I'd stay single," says Ellen Tan (not her real name), a 37-year-old divorcée in Singapore. "Marriage is not everything. It creates more problems. Some of my single friends say they're lonely. But the burdens of a marriage are worse than being alone."
Some call that type of thinking sacrilege. And despite the changing mind-set, the notion that a woman must be a wife and a mother is powerful. Societies and families exert considerable pressure on women to settle down. Most eventually do. But until then it is usually easier for mothers than fathers to understand why their daughter is still single. On the whole, women still bear most of the responsibility for maintaining a home and raising a family. In some countries women are expected to care for their in-laws, boost their husbands' careers and ensure that their kids get onto the fast track. Even if the couple can afford help in the house, the woman still has to take the lead. Men will pitch in: they will take the kids to the park or go to the supermarket. But that might be it.
For women, and men, who marry later the decision to have kids is just that: a choice. Most couples will have children, though smaller families are the natural consequence of rising prosperity the world over. But to some the idea of women forsaking the right, and responsibility, to bear children is profoundly unsettling. Listen to Yi Mun Yol, 49, one of Korea's most famous novelists and the author of a controversial book that challenges feminism. "I have to be concerned about women evading marriage altogether because that has the same effect as evading childbirth," he says. "I see that as a threat to the continuation of the world as it is."
The trend has some governments worried too. In places like Japan and Taiwan, the pattern is most pronounced; in Singapore and Malaysia the changes are most pronounced upon. Japan's Ministry of Health and Welfare forecasts that one out of seven girls born after 1980 will remain single for the rest of their lives. If current Japanese childbearing trends continue, the population could shrink to half its size by the end of the next century. The government is trying to prevent this by spending some $536 million on such programs as expanded day care. A few towns offer tax breaks and housing benefits to young families. In a classic sign of the times in Taiwan, family-planning officials have updated the island's 1960s slogan: "Two children is just right" has been replaced by "Go for two."
The Singapore government provides matchmaking services -- one for college graduates, another for non-grads. It also offers child-care subsidies for working mothers and housing incentives and higher tax rebates for having more kids. In Malaysia, Works Minister Samy Vellu cautioned last October that a nation-threatening "bachelor-girl syndrome was creeping into society." (Most "bachelor girls," though, considered Vellu's comments to be a bigger cause for alarm.)
At the heart of the matter is money or, to put it more delicately, national prosperity. "Working women have contributed to these economies," says Fanny Cheung, head of Hong Kong's Equal Opportunities Commission. They should be thanked for helping build up their societies, she says, not blamed for destroying the family. Indeed, many women stay single precisely because they are so successful. And in some cases, married women may be at a disadvantage in the workplace because bosses think their loyalties are divided. "My female executives are very committed to their jobs," says Khatijah Ahmad, managing director of the KAF Group of finance companies and doyenne of Malaysia's businesswomen. "They are very serious and are probably not giving much priority to finding a mate." Not much at all. Professional women throughout the region are clinching deals, winning promotions, starting their own companies. Who has time to date?
Or, as Malaysian Sheryll Stothard puts it: Who wants to make time to date? Stothard, 30, is the managing director of Hikayat, a Kuala Lumpur publishing and public-relations company she helped found 18 months ago. She hasn't seriously thought about marriage since breaking off a longterm relationship some seven years ago. "Right now I'm more concerned about finding a good joint-venture partner than I am about finding a good man," she says. A few weeks ago Stothard was out to dinner with an associate; midway through the meal he mentioned that this was his first date in a while. To which she replied: "Oh, is this a date?"
"I am not lacking without a boyfriend," Stothard says. "If I were -- being the selfish person I am -- I would look. And -- since I'm ambitious and usually successful -- I would get him." Single men are the only ones still gauche enough to ask why she hasn't married. The last time three of her male colleagues posed that question, Stothard asked them why they weren't. "They went on about working too hard, not wanting the responsibility of a family, too many expectations," she says. "And I said, 'Yeah, those are the same reasons I haven't married.'"
Many successful women today see little reason to settle for marriage. D. Katrina, a 31-year-old financial analyst in Kuala Lumpur, is in no rush to make any compromises. "I think there is a lot of sense in what Virginia Woolf wrote: 'A woman must have money and a room of her own. The former stands for the power to contemplate, while a lock on the door means the power to think for oneself,'" Katrina says. "I've got that and I'm going to enjoy it for a little while longer."
Time is a luxury women were not able to afford a decade ago. "It used to be that women older than 25 would rush to marry," says Ikeda Keiko, a director at OMMG, one of Tokyo's biggest matchmaking companies. "They would lower their demands about the bridegroom year by year. Today it doesn't happen that way. Women no longer give up their wishes after 25, or even 35." They are more likely to give up on the bridegrooms.
Irey Lau, a 30-year-old media director at Grey Advertising in Hong Kong, hasn't given up on marriage. Just dating. "I don't waste time on people I am not sure about," she says. Lau is about to join a new company in a more senior position and move to Beijing. During the next two years in China, she says, she won't waste any time on men at all. The only people she will be wooing will be her clients. Her father doesn't get it. Lau recounts a recent exchange between them: "My dad said: 'You started going with boys when you were 14. Now you're 30, and you're not interested. What happened?' So I replied: 'I've seen enough for now.'"
She expects a boyfriend to be able to match her drive, if not her salary. Lau's most enduring relationship was with a man a year older but not as established as she was. "He would compare our positions. He felt uncomfortable since I was earning more than he was," she says. "I don't want to stop for anybody. I told him that my career was more important than our relationship. So we broke up."
It is a familiar story. "Asian men are not yet used to the idea of Asian women who are successful, who may outshine them," says Khatijah of the KAF Group. Some women, of course, will choose to stand back -- Irey Lau would probably call that standing down. She recounts one such instance: a colleague at another advertising agency turned down a promotion because she thought having a more senior title would complicate her search for a husband. Others tell of women whose mothers admonish them not to show off their intelligence; drop the Ph.D from your business card, one anxious parent pleaded.
But dumbing down doesn't suit most single women. "I have money, a good job; I can be demanding about the company I keep," says Susan Liang, a 49-year-old solicitor in Hong Kong. Liang divorced 10 years ago, built her own practice and raised three children. Today her former husband is remarried, she is a leading lawyer with a thriving firm and her kids are studying overseas. "I don't want to remarry unless I meet someone exceptional," she says. "I'm like the Europeans who visit China: I've gone to the Great Wall; I've got my t-shirt." In today's parlance: Been there, done that.
It's true. Other women often are not the best advertisement for marriage. "My sister-in-law has to take care of the kids, help my brother with his career, and do many things for my parents. She has a lot of pressure," says Laura Chao, 30, a radio deejay and MTV Asia music programmer in Taipei. "By comparison I am quite free. I can go wherever I want, do whatever I want." In Taiwan a person like Chao is called a dan shun gwei zhu, or Single Noble. To Chao that's a pretty accurate depiction. "My priorities are work, spending time with friends and family, and travel." Since graduating from college, she has toured through Southeast Asia, Western Europe and the United States. Her next trip is to the clubbing hot spots of Ibiza in Spain and the western Indian state of Goa.
In pursuit of leisure. That is how many single women might describe where their money goes. "I just cannot give up my juicy life where I buy just what I like," says a 31-year-old hospital clerk who lives with her parents in Tokyo. She is not alone. There are more than 1 million unmarried women in their late 20s and 30s in the capital area, and developers these days are designing condos with their needs in mind (for instance, bigger bathrooms and more central locations). Insurance companies structure policies suited to single women (they, not their beneficiaries, receive pensions). Some funeral homes even offer single women places in specially reserved graves (since they don't inherit a traditional spot with their husband's family).
It is all too much for some men. "Young women have indulged in too much freedom from responsibilities, which often are the base of real joy in life," says Takahashi Masato, a 53-year-old science teacher at a Tokyo grammar school. "They only seek pragmatic pleasures."
But it is not just a material world. Women who can provide for themselves want men who can provide emotional support. It is the most precious commodity today. Betty Wei, 30, is a marketing manager for financial news at Dow Jones in Hong Kong. She is the youngest executive in a company known for its hierarchy. But her corporate existence is accidental. Wei grew up in Shanghai, attended university in Britain, married a man introduced to her by family friends, gave up a chance to work at the BBC and moved to Hong Kong because her husband got a job there. It seemed natural then.
In Hong Kong, she couldn't find the inspiration for her real love -- creative writing -- and was frustrated that her husband fell asleep at ballet performances. He needed someone to put a hot meal on the table, talk about his work and go to barbecues with on the weekend, she says. He preferred that she stay at home. She wanted to work. "We didn't know how to care for each other emotionally," Wei says. "We were floundering, and eventually we drowned." They divorced after three years. "It turned out that I will pursue my happiness more seriously than I thought I would," says Wei. "I would like to support my partner's career but I wouldn't un-do myself for him. In a good marriage, both people have to compromise."
Thirty years ago these women would have been considered eccentrics, or worse. Today, double standards still prevail in many societies: bachelor men are envied, bachelor women are pitied. Call these women spinsters or old maids, though, and you'll hear about it. "I have a social life that's pretty fantastic, thank you," says Katrina.
Despite their accomplishments many women still have to defend their decision to stay single, without seeming too defensive. A date with someone, anyone, invites the question, "Could he be the one?" Family gatherings are trouble, weddings are bad and family weddings are even worse. "I dread going to family weddings because of the inevitable, 'So when is it your turn?'" Katrina says. "I have to smile and mumble something polite. The question doesn't upset me, but the tone does. It is as if nothing else I've achieved in my life is worth anything if I'm not married."
Indeed, single women are no strangers to those who calculate their merit by number -- and that doesn't mean their salary. Any would be able to tell you about the time her friend, aunt or colleague hinted that her sell-by date is fast approaching. Or that her saham dah turun (Malay for, her shares have gone down). Koreans say that single women should lower their eyes (in other words, their standards). In Hong Kong, they say that a 30-year-old woman is like a used tea bag.
Of course part of the pressure to bear children is real, or at least biological. The clock is ticking, though not as fast as some insist, or as loudly as some would-be grandparents would like. They find subtle and less-subtle ways to remind their daughters that they, at least, are ready for a little one. For Chinese New Year, Wei's father gave her a statue of Guanyin, a Buddha sitting on a lotus leaf holding a baby.
Some couples delay having children so they can save up; others so they can savor their marriage. Other career women say they just aren't meant to be mothers. Many men seem puzzled. Consider Korean author Yi's thoughts on the subject: "I think bees create the most perfect society. Every bee except the queen bee works. I highly value the fact that the bee that gives birth is the queen. I don't understand why women abandon the path of a queen and strive to become a work bee."
But they do. One couple in Hong Kong have a three-year-old son, a full-time nanny, full-time jobs and a stack of books on child-rearing. She is teaching her son to read and supervising piano practice on the weekends. "I'm aggressive in learning how to give him the best," mom says. Her mother-in-law would like a second grandchild, but the 37-year-old has ruled that out. "I barely have enough time for one," she says. "How can I have two?"
Wang Shih-sue, 29, secretary-general of the Taiwan Association for Human Rights, and her husband David Liao, 31, decided they don't want even one. "Our work means everything to us," says Wang. "Neither of us wants to quit working to raise a child. My freedom and quality of life are very important. I don't want to lose what I have for the sake of a child." Liao, director of the Taiwan Labor Front, adds: "The most important reason is that we don't want a third person interfering in our relationship."
Their parents haven't been able to accept this notion. They wonder who will care for the couple later in life. "They also think we have a social responsibility to contribute a child to our society," says Wang. So do many governments, which, for now, are mostly run by old fathers. But some women believe that society should count on them for more than childbearing. And they are delivering.
-- With reporting from Kuala Lumpur, Manila, Singapore, Seoul, Taipei and Tokyo
I have decided to post an article about global warming in my next entry. For now...
It seems that me and my single unattached women friends are not trendsetters at all. It makes me think of why and how long the Asia Week, no less, observed this social (?) truth.
(Source: http://www.asiaweek.com/asiaweek/97/0627/cs1.html)
WHY WOMEN STAY SINGLE
The best and brightest are snubbing men, marriage and baby-making for work, fun and adventure. Should Asia be worried?
By Susan Berfield
HENRIETTA CLAUDIA "BONJIN" BOLINAO, a 40-something who runs her own public-relations firm, was planning to get married -- just as soon as she could find the time. First she had to help produce a book, The Philippines: A Journey through the Archipelago. Then her firm won two prestigious accounts, carmakers Volvo and UMC Nissan, and that kept her busy. She also decided to redecorate her apartment, improve her golf game, travel around the world and spend more time meditating. Her fiancé, a writer in Manila three years her junior, didn't seem too perturbed by the delays. As any sensible woman would, she considered that a warning sign. He was "a good guy, with a thinking mind," Bolinao says. Even her mother liked him. But maybe, she thought, he was scared to settle down. Or maybe, her friends thought, he was worried that she wouldn't.
Bolinao reviewed the situation: "He let me pursue my career and saw me through hard times when I set up my company. But at the same time he expected me to assume the role of the traditional Filipina woman. I was supposed to make sure everything was spic and span at home, be the perfect cook and ironing lady -- he even taught me how to iron properly. That whole thing can get really tiring." Bolinao and her fiancé eventually called off the wedding. "I really think we are soul mates. But we are better off as friends," she says now, two years later. "I will always love him. But I don't know about getting married."
For Bolinao, and women like her throughout Asia, marriage is not the first priority in life. Nor is it the last resort, the only way to secure a home and place in society. Marriage, for some, has become almost an alternative lifestyle: it is a choice, not a necessity. The majority will one day wed, but they will do so on their terms. Single women don't all put marriage -- and childbearing -- at the end of their list of things-to-do. Some are dating, some waiting to meet their destiny in a taxi queue. Others try their luck with the personals. But few of these single women -- or at least fewer than men might imagine -- are laying awake at night worrying about finding a suitable match. "A man for me is a bonus, like winning the lottery," Bolinao says. "With or without a man, I am fulfilled."
These single women have a few things in common: a high degree of educational and professional success, financial security, ambition and pride. For them being single at age 30, or 35, or older, is not a stigma; it's a status symbol. Some might even call it chic. They work hard. They travel. They are independent. These women won't settle for men who don't inspire them or nurture their aspirations. A good husband, they say, can keep pace with his wife without stepping on her toes. These are women who are used to having their own space. They want a man with maturity, not just money; someone who will be a companion, not a guardian.
These women are quick to add that those kind of men are scarce. Or already spoken for. Some suggest that it's not even worth looking, given that too few marriages succeed. "If I were starting all over again, I'd stay single," says Ellen Tan (not her real name), a 37-year-old divorcée in Singapore. "Marriage is not everything. It creates more problems. Some of my single friends say they're lonely. But the burdens of a marriage are worse than being alone."
Some call that type of thinking sacrilege. And despite the changing mind-set, the notion that a woman must be a wife and a mother is powerful. Societies and families exert considerable pressure on women to settle down. Most eventually do. But until then it is usually easier for mothers than fathers to understand why their daughter is still single. On the whole, women still bear most of the responsibility for maintaining a home and raising a family. In some countries women are expected to care for their in-laws, boost their husbands' careers and ensure that their kids get onto the fast track. Even if the couple can afford help in the house, the woman still has to take the lead. Men will pitch in: they will take the kids to the park or go to the supermarket. But that might be it.
For women, and men, who marry later the decision to have kids is just that: a choice. Most couples will have children, though smaller families are the natural consequence of rising prosperity the world over. But to some the idea of women forsaking the right, and responsibility, to bear children is profoundly unsettling. Listen to Yi Mun Yol, 49, one of Korea's most famous novelists and the author of a controversial book that challenges feminism. "I have to be concerned about women evading marriage altogether because that has the same effect as evading childbirth," he says. "I see that as a threat to the continuation of the world as it is."
The trend has some governments worried too. In places like Japan and Taiwan, the pattern is most pronounced; in Singapore and Malaysia the changes are most pronounced upon. Japan's Ministry of Health and Welfare forecasts that one out of seven girls born after 1980 will remain single for the rest of their lives. If current Japanese childbearing trends continue, the population could shrink to half its size by the end of the next century. The government is trying to prevent this by spending some $536 million on such programs as expanded day care. A few towns offer tax breaks and housing benefits to young families. In a classic sign of the times in Taiwan, family-planning officials have updated the island's 1960s slogan: "Two children is just right" has been replaced by "Go for two."
The Singapore government provides matchmaking services -- one for college graduates, another for non-grads. It also offers child-care subsidies for working mothers and housing incentives and higher tax rebates for having more kids. In Malaysia, Works Minister Samy Vellu cautioned last October that a nation-threatening "bachelor-girl syndrome was creeping into society." (Most "bachelor girls," though, considered Vellu's comments to be a bigger cause for alarm.)
At the heart of the matter is money or, to put it more delicately, national prosperity. "Working women have contributed to these economies," says Fanny Cheung, head of Hong Kong's Equal Opportunities Commission. They should be thanked for helping build up their societies, she says, not blamed for destroying the family. Indeed, many women stay single precisely because they are so successful. And in some cases, married women may be at a disadvantage in the workplace because bosses think their loyalties are divided. "My female executives are very committed to their jobs," says Khatijah Ahmad, managing director of the KAF Group of finance companies and doyenne of Malaysia's businesswomen. "They are very serious and are probably not giving much priority to finding a mate." Not much at all. Professional women throughout the region are clinching deals, winning promotions, starting their own companies. Who has time to date?
Or, as Malaysian Sheryll Stothard puts it: Who wants to make time to date? Stothard, 30, is the managing director of Hikayat, a Kuala Lumpur publishing and public-relations company she helped found 18 months ago. She hasn't seriously thought about marriage since breaking off a longterm relationship some seven years ago. "Right now I'm more concerned about finding a good joint-venture partner than I am about finding a good man," she says. A few weeks ago Stothard was out to dinner with an associate; midway through the meal he mentioned that this was his first date in a while. To which she replied: "Oh, is this a date?"
"I am not lacking without a boyfriend," Stothard says. "If I were -- being the selfish person I am -- I would look. And -- since I'm ambitious and usually successful -- I would get him." Single men are the only ones still gauche enough to ask why she hasn't married. The last time three of her male colleagues posed that question, Stothard asked them why they weren't. "They went on about working too hard, not wanting the responsibility of a family, too many expectations," she says. "And I said, 'Yeah, those are the same reasons I haven't married.'"
Many successful women today see little reason to settle for marriage. D. Katrina, a 31-year-old financial analyst in Kuala Lumpur, is in no rush to make any compromises. "I think there is a lot of sense in what Virginia Woolf wrote: 'A woman must have money and a room of her own. The former stands for the power to contemplate, while a lock on the door means the power to think for oneself,'" Katrina says. "I've got that and I'm going to enjoy it for a little while longer."
Time is a luxury women were not able to afford a decade ago. "It used to be that women older than 25 would rush to marry," says Ikeda Keiko, a director at OMMG, one of Tokyo's biggest matchmaking companies. "They would lower their demands about the bridegroom year by year. Today it doesn't happen that way. Women no longer give up their wishes after 25, or even 35." They are more likely to give up on the bridegrooms.
Irey Lau, a 30-year-old media director at Grey Advertising in Hong Kong, hasn't given up on marriage. Just dating. "I don't waste time on people I am not sure about," she says. Lau is about to join a new company in a more senior position and move to Beijing. During the next two years in China, she says, she won't waste any time on men at all. The only people she will be wooing will be her clients. Her father doesn't get it. Lau recounts a recent exchange between them: "My dad said: 'You started going with boys when you were 14. Now you're 30, and you're not interested. What happened?' So I replied: 'I've seen enough for now.'"
She expects a boyfriend to be able to match her drive, if not her salary. Lau's most enduring relationship was with a man a year older but not as established as she was. "He would compare our positions. He felt uncomfortable since I was earning more than he was," she says. "I don't want to stop for anybody. I told him that my career was more important than our relationship. So we broke up."
It is a familiar story. "Asian men are not yet used to the idea of Asian women who are successful, who may outshine them," says Khatijah of the KAF Group. Some women, of course, will choose to stand back -- Irey Lau would probably call that standing down. She recounts one such instance: a colleague at another advertising agency turned down a promotion because she thought having a more senior title would complicate her search for a husband. Others tell of women whose mothers admonish them not to show off their intelligence; drop the Ph.D from your business card, one anxious parent pleaded.
But dumbing down doesn't suit most single women. "I have money, a good job; I can be demanding about the company I keep," says Susan Liang, a 49-year-old solicitor in Hong Kong. Liang divorced 10 years ago, built her own practice and raised three children. Today her former husband is remarried, she is a leading lawyer with a thriving firm and her kids are studying overseas. "I don't want to remarry unless I meet someone exceptional," she says. "I'm like the Europeans who visit China: I've gone to the Great Wall; I've got my t-shirt." In today's parlance: Been there, done that.
It's true. Other women often are not the best advertisement for marriage. "My sister-in-law has to take care of the kids, help my brother with his career, and do many things for my parents. She has a lot of pressure," says Laura Chao, 30, a radio deejay and MTV Asia music programmer in Taipei. "By comparison I am quite free. I can go wherever I want, do whatever I want." In Taiwan a person like Chao is called a dan shun gwei zhu, or Single Noble. To Chao that's a pretty accurate depiction. "My priorities are work, spending time with friends and family, and travel." Since graduating from college, she has toured through Southeast Asia, Western Europe and the United States. Her next trip is to the clubbing hot spots of Ibiza in Spain and the western Indian state of Goa.
In pursuit of leisure. That is how many single women might describe where their money goes. "I just cannot give up my juicy life where I buy just what I like," says a 31-year-old hospital clerk who lives with her parents in Tokyo. She is not alone. There are more than 1 million unmarried women in their late 20s and 30s in the capital area, and developers these days are designing condos with their needs in mind (for instance, bigger bathrooms and more central locations). Insurance companies structure policies suited to single women (they, not their beneficiaries, receive pensions). Some funeral homes even offer single women places in specially reserved graves (since they don't inherit a traditional spot with their husband's family).
It is all too much for some men. "Young women have indulged in too much freedom from responsibilities, which often are the base of real joy in life," says Takahashi Masato, a 53-year-old science teacher at a Tokyo grammar school. "They only seek pragmatic pleasures."
But it is not just a material world. Women who can provide for themselves want men who can provide emotional support. It is the most precious commodity today. Betty Wei, 30, is a marketing manager for financial news at Dow Jones in Hong Kong. She is the youngest executive in a company known for its hierarchy. But her corporate existence is accidental. Wei grew up in Shanghai, attended university in Britain, married a man introduced to her by family friends, gave up a chance to work at the BBC and moved to Hong Kong because her husband got a job there. It seemed natural then.
In Hong Kong, she couldn't find the inspiration for her real love -- creative writing -- and was frustrated that her husband fell asleep at ballet performances. He needed someone to put a hot meal on the table, talk about his work and go to barbecues with on the weekend, she says. He preferred that she stay at home. She wanted to work. "We didn't know how to care for each other emotionally," Wei says. "We were floundering, and eventually we drowned." They divorced after three years. "It turned out that I will pursue my happiness more seriously than I thought I would," says Wei. "I would like to support my partner's career but I wouldn't un-do myself for him. In a good marriage, both people have to compromise."
Thirty years ago these women would have been considered eccentrics, or worse. Today, double standards still prevail in many societies: bachelor men are envied, bachelor women are pitied. Call these women spinsters or old maids, though, and you'll hear about it. "I have a social life that's pretty fantastic, thank you," says Katrina.
Despite their accomplishments many women still have to defend their decision to stay single, without seeming too defensive. A date with someone, anyone, invites the question, "Could he be the one?" Family gatherings are trouble, weddings are bad and family weddings are even worse. "I dread going to family weddings because of the inevitable, 'So when is it your turn?'" Katrina says. "I have to smile and mumble something polite. The question doesn't upset me, but the tone does. It is as if nothing else I've achieved in my life is worth anything if I'm not married."
Indeed, single women are no strangers to those who calculate their merit by number -- and that doesn't mean their salary. Any would be able to tell you about the time her friend, aunt or colleague hinted that her sell-by date is fast approaching. Or that her saham dah turun (Malay for, her shares have gone down). Koreans say that single women should lower their eyes (in other words, their standards). In Hong Kong, they say that a 30-year-old woman is like a used tea bag.
Of course part of the pressure to bear children is real, or at least biological. The clock is ticking, though not as fast as some insist, or as loudly as some would-be grandparents would like. They find subtle and less-subtle ways to remind their daughters that they, at least, are ready for a little one. For Chinese New Year, Wei's father gave her a statue of Guanyin, a Buddha sitting on a lotus leaf holding a baby.
Some couples delay having children so they can save up; others so they can savor their marriage. Other career women say they just aren't meant to be mothers. Many men seem puzzled. Consider Korean author Yi's thoughts on the subject: "I think bees create the most perfect society. Every bee except the queen bee works. I highly value the fact that the bee that gives birth is the queen. I don't understand why women abandon the path of a queen and strive to become a work bee."
But they do. One couple in Hong Kong have a three-year-old son, a full-time nanny, full-time jobs and a stack of books on child-rearing. She is teaching her son to read and supervising piano practice on the weekends. "I'm aggressive in learning how to give him the best," mom says. Her mother-in-law would like a second grandchild, but the 37-year-old has ruled that out. "I barely have enough time for one," she says. "How can I have two?"
Wang Shih-sue, 29, secretary-general of the Taiwan Association for Human Rights, and her husband David Liao, 31, decided they don't want even one. "Our work means everything to us," says Wang. "Neither of us wants to quit working to raise a child. My freedom and quality of life are very important. I don't want to lose what I have for the sake of a child." Liao, director of the Taiwan Labor Front, adds: "The most important reason is that we don't want a third person interfering in our relationship."
Their parents haven't been able to accept this notion. They wonder who will care for the couple later in life. "They also think we have a social responsibility to contribute a child to our society," says Wang. So do many governments, which, for now, are mostly run by old fathers. But some women believe that society should count on them for more than childbearing. And they are delivering.
-- With reporting from Kuala Lumpur, Manila, Singapore, Seoul, Taipei and Tokyo
Philippine Brain Drain
I had a talk with a friend months ago why we stay put in the Philippines when all else are telling us to migrate where greener pastures lay.
So why do we stay?
So why do we stay?
- Most of our families are here.
- Most of our good friends are here.
- We have simple wants so maybe we are satisfied with the things we can afford with the salaries we receive.
Simply put, we are home. Do we need to say more?
Here is an article printed at the Newsweek, "Philippines: Workers for the World". It posts a thought-provoking question, "The country's prime export is people. But is migration a real development strategy?" (Source: http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/6100244/site/newsweek/)
By George Wehrfritz and Marites Vitug
Newsweek International
Oct. 4 issue
Galicano Solares lives beneath a highway overpass in a dank Manila slum. His on-again, off-again construction job pays $4 a day, considerably more than he earned in the gold mines of Bicol before he moved to the city in the late 1980s. Yet he can't afford to educate his three children—now under the care of relatives in the countryside—let alone build the middle-class future of their dreams. But the 37-year-old with a stubbly chin and sweat stains on his T shirt has one advantage over others in the squatter settlement: his wife is a domestic helper in Saudi Arabia. "If there's an emergency, we call her," he says, "like when one of our children had a fever recently and we needed money for medicine."
That story of economic struggle, multiplied thousands of times over, is the story of the Philippines. Despite the wave of industrial development that has swept much of East Asia in recent decades, the country of 80 million remains extremely poor, mismanaged and still predominantly agrarian. But the Philippines does play a visible role in the global economy, thanks largely to a single export commodity—its people. According to the government, 1 million Filipinos will go abroad as contract workers this year, the biggest exodus ever. "The Philippines has already surpassed Mexico as the largest source of migrant labor in the world," says Manolo I. Abella, a migration specialist at the International Labour Office in Geneva. In all, about 8 million Filipinos—an astounding one tenth of the country's citizens—currently work overseas to support families back home. They remit more than $7 billion annually, according to the government, but that's only official transfers. A recent Asian Development Bank report put the real figure in the $14 billion to $21 billion range—a sum that dwarfs both foreign direct investment and aid flowing into the country, and amounts to 32 percent of GNP.
In the past, the Philippines was shamed by its inability to create enough good jobs to keep its people at home. But hard economic reality—a 14 percent unemployment rate and one of the highest poverty indexes in the world (nearly half the population subsists on less than $2 a day)—has shifted the sentiment. Today, in a move that countries like Indonesia and Bangladesh are likely to emulate, the government takes the position that, like it or not, the overseas workers constitute the nation's biggest comparative advantage in an increasingly borderless world. And so Manila makes it easy for its citizens to emigrate, and works hard, through its embassies, to see that their rights as foreign workers are protected. When extremists took a Filipino truck—driver hostage in Iraq recently, for example, Manila agreed to withdraw its contingent of soldiers there to win his release.
Unlike much of East Asia, where plummeting fertility rates are the norm, the Philippines could see its population balloon to 130 million by 2050. Experts say the country would explode if the flow of migrants were halted. "I've always viewed [overseas employment] as a safety valve," Labor and Employment Secretary Patricia A. Sto. Tomas told NEWSWEEK. "If you prevent them from going to Hong Kong or Saudi Arabia, you might have a revolution on your hands." That risk, combined with official helplessness to fix the local economy, has forced Manila to reconsider migration in a fundamental way. Its new—and more controversial—position: "Our traits as a people lend ourselves well to being part of the [global] service industry," says Tomas. "Perhaps that is what globalization means to us."
Labor migration is as old as the nation-state. Millions of Irish fled a devastating potato famine between 1846 and 1848, Chinese fanned out across Southeast Asia for similar reasons in the 19th century and India suffered a postcolonial brain drain that has only recently begun to reverse itself. Yet both the volume of today's labor outflow from the Philippines, and the extent to which Manila facilitates it, are unique. In a system that has evolved since strongman Ferdinand Marcos dispatched crews to work Saudi Arabian oilfields in the 1970s, the government licenses workers heading overseas, collects fees for each departure, regulates a mushrooming labor-brokerage industry and tasks its diplomats to protect a burgeoning expatriate work force based on 56 bilateral treaties with host nations around the world.
Unlike Mexico, where the vast majority of departing migrants head for a single country (the United States) illegally, Filipinos find themselves welcomed around the world as contract employees, both semiskilled and professional. They're laying pipelines in Siberia, mining diamonds in Angola and sailing ships in all the world's oceans. They clean thousands of homes a day from Hong Kong to Dubai to London; Bahrain's prime minister employs some 50 Filipinos in his own household, and is said to have developed such a fondness for the woman who manages them all that he sends her home to the Philippines on vacation each year accompanied by a bodyguard.
But some experts worry that the trend will, in the long run, hurt the Philippines more than help. While labor migration does serve as an economic stopgap, it's not a good development model. That's especially true when a country starts losing its best and its brightest workers. Although the stereotypical Filipino migrant is a nanny in Hong Kong, the largest group of new recruits falls under the category "professional and technical worker," which includes engineers, pilots, physicians and nurses. In 2002 they accounted for 35 percent of all departures—and many social workers fear their flight will bring down the country's medical system, erode its technology base and, in the end, ruin any chance the Philippines has of becoming a modern, industrialized country. "One of the defining characteristics of the Philippine middle class," says a senior Western economist in Manila, "is that they all want to get out."
The reason is simple: low pay. Lilian Bayot, a 29-year-old nurse with the Red Cross in Manila, earns $3,000 a year, which she says is "not enough to support my family." So she is now awaiting a visa to work in the United States. She plans to settle in Florida, where she's got a pending job offer that will pay her $40,000 a year. And she'll become eligible for a green card within months. According to a global salary study done in 2002, the average Filipino nurse earned just $139 a month at home compared with $650 in Singapore, $982 in Saudi Arabia and $1,666 in the United Kingdom. Nurses now leave the Philippines at three times the rate at which they matriculate and enter the work force.
Top college grads face the same salary problem. Last March a 28-year-old medical-school graduate named Elmer Reyes Jacinto stirred a national outcry when he topped the annual medical board exams (besting 947 other successful test takers) only to announce his intention to move to New York to become a nurse. He has since changed his mind—opting instead for a nursing job in Florida. "It's hypocritical when I say it's not economic," says Jacinto. "But it's more than that. I see a brighter future for myself there than here." Dr. Jaime Galvez Tan, vice chancellor for research at the University of the Philippines in Manila, sees that as a troubling portent. "Sadly, this is no longer brain drain, but more appropriately, brain hemorrhage," he says. "Very soon the Philippines will be bled dry."
Labor migration also has a social cost. Experts say that overseas employment is exacerbating social problems in the Philippines, including juvenile delinquency and marital breakups. According to one study, a typical domestic worker in Saudi Arabia will remit the bulk of her $200 monthly salary to her husband, who uses the money to buy consumer products for the children and to support extended family members looking for handouts. The husband often can't or won't find work. Worse, says Florence May Cortina, who heads a help center for migrant workers in Quezon City near Metro Manila, the overseas worker is often shocked to learn "there is no savings" when she returns. Another study declares the kids of migrants "emotional orphans" more likely to commit crime, take drugs or have children out of wedlock.
A decade ago, when Fidel Ramos ran the Philippines and the country looked set to become Asia's newest manufacturing center, officials spoke optimistically of bringing overseas workers home. Their logic: professionals and semiskilled Filipinos with savings in their pockets could spur development by starting small companies. "We were riding a wave of growth," says Cielito Habito, Economic Planning secretary under Ramos. "There was a sense that they had something to come home to." But the 1997-98 Asian financial crisis sent the country into a prolonged tailspin, and it hasn't yet recovered. Habito views outmigration as a necessary evil, saying: "Some people have begun to argue that this is part of our natural role in the world. Frankly, I'm ambivalent about that."
Fernando Aldaba, an economist at Ateneo de Manila University, argues that the government is using remittance payments to mask its economic-policy failures. He asserts that to create new and better jobs, Manila must streamline the economy, attract foreign investment, encourage entrepreneurship and find ways to make household members more productive—none of which is happening with any great haste today. "People leave because of lack of opportunities," he concludes. "The government shouldn't be let off the hook."
Migration proponents insist the situation isn't quite so dire. Labor outflow, they argue, equips Filipinos with skills, know-how and capital. They eventually return home and carry the national economy forward—much like the expatriate Irish did in their homeland in the 1990s. Pessimists point to Lebanon, where remittances from overseas have propped up a dysfunctional state. As Filipinos add to their achievements overseas, it's only a matter of time before the government will face the same question once posed to Indian Prime Minister Indira Gandhi: How is it that Indians succeed everywhere but in their home country?
That's irrelevant to Galicano Solares. When his wife returns from her second two-year stint in Saudi Arabia next February, he hopes to be able to surprise her with news that he, too, will make such a journey. "I've already prepared my passport," he says. "I want to work as a ship's repairman in Jamaica." Then they will typify the new middle-class family: Mom in the Middle East, Dad in the Caribbean, three kids at home studying to become engineers and nurses so they, too, might someday venture abroad. That's better than living under a freeway, to be sure. But is it the best Manila can offer? For now, the answer is yes.
Friday, April 06, 2007
Immortalizing Oneself
What is it about the third millennium that people all over the world wants to immortalize oneself in more than one way, e.g., personal Web sites, blogs, online videos, and the list goes on?
I should be one to ask when I have a blog which I update when my schedule permits. So why do I maintain it?
As I have written, the time I decided to create my blog, I felt that I needed to share the gifts I received then because I am merely a vessel.
Then I enrolled in graduate studies. I was quite proud of the articles I wrote because I earned decent grades, as I mentioned over and over again :D Well, I also spent a number of sleepless nights to be able to come up with a decent article so I felt that uploading it was just the icing on the cake.
I always tell my gifted co-workers and friends to go into teaching so that their talents and skills will not die with them and will be passed on to future achievers.
I remember I attended a retreat a few years ago and was asked if I planned to go into teaching eventually. I honestly answered no because I didn't hear the call to teaching then. I still haven't heard it till now.
However, I have no qualms about mentoring a co-worker, for now. I have already done it a few times in the past and I felt genuine fulfillment in seeing someone doing some things his own way, actually improving my style, after some time.
Call me narcissistic but immortalizing oneself if enough motivation to do things well. Immortalizing oneself is enough reason to check myself to always do my best. I think, people of all generations have always wanted to immortalize oneself in different ways. We people of the third millennium just have the internet and free blog and video sites to make netizens access information about us through cyberspace.
I should be one to ask when I have a blog which I update when my schedule permits. So why do I maintain it?
As I have written, the time I decided to create my blog, I felt that I needed to share the gifts I received then because I am merely a vessel.
Then I enrolled in graduate studies. I was quite proud of the articles I wrote because I earned decent grades, as I mentioned over and over again :D Well, I also spent a number of sleepless nights to be able to come up with a decent article so I felt that uploading it was just the icing on the cake.
I always tell my gifted co-workers and friends to go into teaching so that their talents and skills will not die with them and will be passed on to future achievers.
I remember I attended a retreat a few years ago and was asked if I planned to go into teaching eventually. I honestly answered no because I didn't hear the call to teaching then. I still haven't heard it till now.
However, I have no qualms about mentoring a co-worker, for now. I have already done it a few times in the past and I felt genuine fulfillment in seeing someone doing some things his own way, actually improving my style, after some time.
Call me narcissistic but immortalizing oneself if enough motivation to do things well. Immortalizing oneself is enough reason to check myself to always do my best. I think, people of all generations have always wanted to immortalize oneself in different ways. We people of the third millennium just have the internet and free blog and video sites to make netizens access information about us through cyberspace.
Thursday, April 05, 2007
Spinsters for Christ?
This post is about several conversations which took place in the office...
I told an officemate that I am an active member of the DLSU Singles for Christ (SFC). He told another one of our officemates who teased me about it. He wittily changed SFC to mean SPINSTERS for Christ. One time, I passed by his room to tell him I was about to leave to attend an SFC get-together. He asked me what we do to pass time. Then, he went on to tease me if we were taught how to crochet stuff in preparation for old age. I told him he was not far off. I also told him that I would take a video of it, upload it in YouTube and would oblige him to post a comment about it.
A few days after, he told me that the office would offer housing loans and I should avail of it. I also told him that it was all part of my preparation for eternal spinsterhood. I already have a pension plan which was big enough to support me when the time comes. They just laughed with me.
Then I told a good friend about my plan. She said she would also like to buy one right next to mine. She is a good friend and her remark just made me more excited. Again, i told my officemate about this. He gave me a brilliant idea. He said I should tell all my SFC friends about it and come to live in a single subdivision which will be called Spinsters' Village.
Thinking about it actually made more sense. We could actually live in a village close to each other so our support group will be literally close by. It was a brilliant idea.
I told another friend about this. He asked me why I have already given up hope that i will settle down and have a family of my own. I told him that hope still springs eternal in my heart that I will be a loving wife to a dear man who will be my beloved husband. I sincerely hope that someday I will be a devoted mom to children I will bear and rear to be God-fearing people.
However, this prayer of mine should not keep me from my preparation for single blessedness too. After all, I still live in the reality that for now, I am going through life alone.
I told an officemate that I am an active member of the DLSU Singles for Christ (SFC). He told another one of our officemates who teased me about it. He wittily changed SFC to mean SPINSTERS for Christ. One time, I passed by his room to tell him I was about to leave to attend an SFC get-together. He asked me what we do to pass time. Then, he went on to tease me if we were taught how to crochet stuff in preparation for old age. I told him he was not far off. I also told him that I would take a video of it, upload it in YouTube and would oblige him to post a comment about it.
A few days after, he told me that the office would offer housing loans and I should avail of it. I also told him that it was all part of my preparation for eternal spinsterhood. I already have a pension plan which was big enough to support me when the time comes. They just laughed with me.
Then I told a good friend about my plan. She said she would also like to buy one right next to mine. She is a good friend and her remark just made me more excited. Again, i told my officemate about this. He gave me a brilliant idea. He said I should tell all my SFC friends about it and come to live in a single subdivision which will be called Spinsters' Village.
Thinking about it actually made more sense. We could actually live in a village close to each other so our support group will be literally close by. It was a brilliant idea.
I told another friend about this. He asked me why I have already given up hope that i will settle down and have a family of my own. I told him that hope still springs eternal in my heart that I will be a loving wife to a dear man who will be my beloved husband. I sincerely hope that someday I will be a devoted mom to children I will bear and rear to be God-fearing people.
However, this prayer of mine should not keep me from my preparation for single blessedness too. After all, I still live in the reality that for now, I am going through life alone.
Haven't Been This Sick in a Long Time
Call me a nerd but I actually looked forward to the 5-day weekend to concentrate on my school papers. I thought it was timely that the professor generously gave an extension of 1 day so we could polish our papers. I was ready to work on it non-stop as I have no need to worry about getting up late to go to work and I could sleep on and off till my paper gets done.
I woke up fairly late today wanting to extend my stay in bed some more. Then I remembered, I should work on my school paper. Barely half an hour after I turned my computer on, I felt a minor headache. I tried to ignore it while I surfed the internet to look for references. An hour after, I just couldn't understand a word of the English Web sites I visited. I told myself, it was time to take a nap.
After barely an hour of sleep, I woke up with a splitting headache. I thought it was pathetic for me to cry but I just couldn't help it. Here I was, lying on my bed, when I felt my tummy turning. It was a good thing I was able to run to puke. After an hour or so, the rest of my breakfast was down the drain. It was already 2:00 p.m. then and I haven't had lunch yet.
I can barely recall the last time I had the fever. I can't claim to eat a healthy diet as I eat mostly fastfood meals nowadays, but I thought my body knew how to take care of itself well by now. Come to think of it, personal history reminded me that while I am in the middle of being busy, my body coped quite well. The good Lord reminds me to take better care of myself, i.e., eat at the right time and sleep longer mostly, after I do my job well.
I went to sleep again and I felt recharged. Way, way better! I felt like my old self again. God's blessings never stop pouring.
I woke up fairly late today wanting to extend my stay in bed some more. Then I remembered, I should work on my school paper. Barely half an hour after I turned my computer on, I felt a minor headache. I tried to ignore it while I surfed the internet to look for references. An hour after, I just couldn't understand a word of the English Web sites I visited. I told myself, it was time to take a nap.
After barely an hour of sleep, I woke up with a splitting headache. I thought it was pathetic for me to cry but I just couldn't help it. Here I was, lying on my bed, when I felt my tummy turning. It was a good thing I was able to run to puke. After an hour or so, the rest of my breakfast was down the drain. It was already 2:00 p.m. then and I haven't had lunch yet.
I can barely recall the last time I had the fever. I can't claim to eat a healthy diet as I eat mostly fastfood meals nowadays, but I thought my body knew how to take care of itself well by now. Come to think of it, personal history reminded me that while I am in the middle of being busy, my body coped quite well. The good Lord reminds me to take better care of myself, i.e., eat at the right time and sleep longer mostly, after I do my job well.
I went to sleep again and I felt recharged. Way, way better! I felt like my old self again. God's blessings never stop pouring.
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