My First Trip to Mindanao

In October 3-7, I was on vacation from Tuesday to Saturday. I went to Iligan, Cagayan de Oro and Camiguin with officemates. I am blest to have friends who are fond of going on low-budget out-of-town trips.

I called Brian’s cell phone at around 3:15 am so as not to disturb the entire household with the doorbell. He was still taking a bath. His brothers prepared breakfast for me, donut and milk. We left their house at around 3:45 am to catch our 5:15 am flight to Cagayan de Oro. We arrived at the airport with plenty of time to spare. As expected, there was a long queue of people trying to check in. Apparently, the lady in the counter with a very soft voice was through calling out passengers bound to Cagayan and we didn’t hear it so when it was our turn to check in, she turned us down. She argued for a while but later on attended to our tickets.

We did all the touristy things expected of first-timers in a place. We saw the Katibawasan Falls, the Tinago Falls, the Cold Spring, among others. The only place we weren’t able to go to was the Sandbar off-Camiguin. Though the waves were manageable from everybody’s point of view, the boatmen feared the wind was too strong.

The highlight of the trip was the canopy walk-zipline-white water rafting activities. I still can’t believe I was able to do all three because they involved the two things I feared most, heights and deep water. The guide in the canopy walk and zipline wasn’t much help. He just kept on telling jokes that I’m sure were so old and NOT true but made me fear for my life, nevertheless. It is ironic that they named it canopy walk because there were really three suspension bridges that were so high above the ground, at least by my standards.

I was able to laugh a little about myself when it came to the zipline. I was placed on a secure harness while the guide tested by letting go of his hold on it. Instead of going down like my friends, I actually floated in the air because I was so light. They all teased me that I might stop in the middle of the line because my weight would not be enough to sustain the speed I needed to reach the other end. As the activity was video-taped, I told them that they might as well expect to see me with my eyes tightly shut. Was I proven wrong! As the wind blew on my face, I cherished the 15 second or so trip with my eyes wide open. It is something I’d love to do again.

As with the canopy walk and zipline, the white water rafting wasn’t that scary at all. I have long ago learned that the key to all rides, e.g., roller coaster, loops, etc., is to let my body go with the flow and the rhythm of the ride, not to fight it with all my might. I was even bold enough to take the front seat where there was no place to lock my foot to prevent me from being overthrown from the raft. The waves of the river pushed the water up and took care of my security, so to speak.

Another part which is very memorable to me was the food. I told my friends that this is the first time I recall buying food to bring home from vacation. I loved the pastel (Camiguin’s signature bread), Iligan’s roasted peanuts and Cagayan de Oro’s fruit pie. They were all so yummy!!!

As with any other trip, what made the experience special was the new friend I gained. She was so sweet.

Can’t wait for the next trip lined up with the same people and a few others. Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia, here we come.

The Center’s Continuing Legacy: The Philippine Center for Investigative Journalism throughout the Years

The Center’s Continuing Legacy:
The Philippine Center for Investigative Journalism throughout the Years

I distinctly recall a class in our Development Journalism subject in college where our professor asked what kind of journalism we wanted to practice. My reply was investigative journalism. This arose from reading detective stories from grade school until high school like Nancy Drew, Hardy Boys, Perry Mason, and seeing legal drama series, such as LA Law, and even re-runs of Matlock. I remember that I was always amazed by the logic and meticulous manner they solved the different cases. I never really thought of being a detective or lady cop but I have always been fascinated by the manner the issues are solved by inquisitive minds that unravel evidences in search of the truth.

Little did I know that this simple thought which entered my mind as a teenager has actually been institutionalized through a research paper written by Honorable Rigoberto D. Tiglao (“Office of the Presidential Chief of Staff” Office of the Republic of the Philippines President Web Site. 26 August 2006 ) during his Nieman Fellowship at the Harvard University. The proposal on the establishment of a center to “address the need for newspapers and broadcast agencies to go beyond day-to-day reportage” (Philippine Center for Investigative Journalism Online. 26 August 2006
<>) gave birth to the Philippine Center for Investigative Journalism (PCIJ) in 1989 together with his colleagues who are all well-respected Filipino journalists. They are Sheila Coronel, Beting Laygo-Dolor, Malou Mangahas, Lorna Kalaw-Tirol, Howie Severino and David Celdran.

To date, PCIJ has published over 180 articles in major Philippine newspapers and magazines, produced five (5) full-length documentaries and launched more than 20 books about politics & government, journalism & media, the environment, women and special interests. PCIJ’s catchy slogan tells it all: “We tell it like it is… No matter who… No matter what… Journalism with an Impact”

We tell it like it is…

“The PCIJ is unique because of its special focus on investigative journalism. Our organization is funded by a combination of grants, revenues and contributions from individual supporters. Our funding structure allows us to be independent because we are beholden neither to media owners nor to advertisers nor even to grant-giving organizations (the diversity of our funding base allows us to choose the projects we want to do with donors and to set our own terms with them). We are, however, accountable to our board and ultimately, to our readers,” says Sheila Coronel, PCIJ Director (Philippine Center for Investigative Journalism Online. 26 August 2006 < p="4">).

Last year, the Center published the article Health Politics Demoralizes Doctors (Philippine Center for Investigative Journalism Online. 24 May 2005
) One of the examples cited is how barrio doctor Richard Lariosa had to persuade the Tagapul-an, Samar mayor to turn over all the medicine stocks to the rural health unit after being assured that the people would know the medicines came from him. Eventually, Lariosa was assigned to Batanes as the Doctors of the Barrio Leaders for Health concluded the Tagapul-an, Samar mayor had little concern about health. The report has the characteristics of standard PCIJ articles where specific names, places and events are cited leaving no questions unanswered.

As far back as 1997, PCIJ published a guide book, Uncovering the Beat: The Real-world Guide to Reporting on Government (Corotan, Gemma Luz, et. al. Manila: Philippine Center for Investigative Journalism, 1997). In journalism terms, a beat applies to a special area assigned to reporters (Ramirez, Jaime B. Philippine Journalism Handbook. Caloocan City: National Book Store. 1989. 581). It could be an area, e.g., CAMANAVA (CAloocan, MAlabon, NAvotas, VAlenzuela), or a government office, e.g., the Department of the Interior and Local Government (DILG). In the book’s Foreword, it mentions the specific objective which is “to aid harassed journalists being sent out to the beat and made to report on key issues and crucial events, often with scarce preparation” (Corotan, Gemma Luz, et. al. Foreword. Manila: Philippine Center for Investigative Journalism, 1997. vii.). The book is divided into eight (8) chapters: Law Enforcement, The Courts, Congress, The Presidency, The Economy, The Environment, Education and Health. These are the beats where most of the biggest news regularly originate.

The most striking subtitle within the book is Looking for Pork in the Congress. The book says that “looking for congressional ‘pork’ is done much the same way that one searches for food: by following its aroma and uncovering the pots that may contain it.” The book posts pertinent questions such as “Does any of this amount go directly to the legislators?,” “Is the ‘pork barrel’ always a bad thing?” and even the meanings of the pork’s fancy names. All questions were answered with clear explanations.

No Matter Who...

With the number of newspapers, magazines and tabloids out in the market, publishers strive to make titles of articles as catchy as possible. A publication may have exclusive coverage about a topic that may appeal to the general reading public yet it may not sell much because when it is placed beside other reading materials, it may not “look and sound” as interesting.

In keeping with the Center’s vision to be a catalyst for consensus that would redound to the promotion of public welfare, PCIJ published the book The Child with a Fish for a Twin (Or How not to Write about Children) (Balgos, Cecile. Manila: Philippine Center for Investigative Journalism, 2001.). The title is deliberately unorthodox to arouse interest on an otherwise uncontroversial yet important issue, the plight of Filipino children. “Ang kabataan ang pag-asa sa kinabukasan,” goes the cliché. It is ironic how little attention is given to children by the media and the government alike.

The United Nations’ most recent statistics (“United Nations’ Millennium Development Goals Indicators.” United Nations in the Philippines. 26 August 2006 ) shows that 27.6% of children under five (5) years old are moderately or severely underweight in the Philippines. No matter how objective a reporter tries to document the plight of children, stories about them are always perceived emotional by the readers. The Child with a Fish for a Twin states the obstacles reporters face when writing about children.

The limited time allotted in gathering data and writing the story means less quality interviews and field research which results to inaccurate news reports. In addition, the primary source of information, the children, are shy and afraid of strangers. To urge the readers who will access the book to spring into action and to be actively involved in improving the living conditions of the children, the book has a directory of government agencies, local and international non-government organizations (NGOs) which they can approach to report injustice committed against children. It also has selected definitions and statistics to further explain terminologies used in the book.

No Matter What...

PCIJ will always be associated with serious, hard-hitting reports which “promote investigative reporting on current issues in the Philippine society.” In addition, it also contributes to promote investigative reporting on “matters of large public interest.” Taking the Filipino culture into account, how Filipinos enjoy a good laugh even through trying times, PCIJ also published Joke ni Erap: A Jokebook to Support Serious Journalism (Philippine Center for Investigative Journalism. Manila: PCIJ, 1999.).

This book was in addition to deposed President Erap Estrada’s Eraption series which he published during the 1998 presidential election campaign period. Joke ni Erap is a product of global exchange. The accessibility of cyberspace is a good medium for all Pinoys dispersed around the world to unite in noisy humor. On its cover, Joke ni Erap irreverently pointed at both Erap and the decorative head of the carabao in front of the passenger jeep and labeled both as Father of Carabao English. Another line printed on the cover is “A Lady without a Lover is like a Joke without Erapsyon.” This is a direct jest to the common knowledge about Erap’s numerous “wives.” The Foreword of the book is aptly entitled “Why a Jokebook?” Its simple reply is “Why not? When all else fails – even this attempt at an introduction – we can always laugh.”

Journalism with an Impact

One political issue that stands out in my mind is the PEA-Amari scam which marred then President Fidel V. Ramos’ credibility. PCIJ’s report PEA-Amari: The Grandmother of all Scams (Philippine Center for Investigative Journalism Online. 26 August 2006
) which won first prize in the 1998 JVO Investigative Journalism Awards quoted full names and the amounts they received in millions of pesos while the negotiations were ongoing. Sheila Coronel and Ellen Tordesillas recreated the events like they were unfolding before the readers’ eyes.

The key person in the transaction, Justiniano “Bobby” Montano IV is described as an aging playboy named after his grandfather, the strongman who held Cavite in thrall from the 1940s to the 1960. A certain Benito Cuevo is depicted as a cagey, nondescript man in his late 60s… a seedy character. Cuevo owns the International Merchandising and Development Corp., a trading company through which some of the Amari commissions were coursed.

While the report mentioned that it was unfortunate the Senate investigation did not pursue President Ramos’ possible role, it also said that it was clear from the Senate hearings that Malacañang’s blessings went a long way in ensuring the deal’s approval. To substantiate its report, the Center was able to quote Senator Franklin Drilon, Chair of the Senate blue ribbon which investigated the deal. He said, “It’s possible DOJ Secretary Teofisto Guingona, Jr. saw the President’s approval in writing and felt he had to sustain the President’s approval.”

President Ramos was not the only Philippine president who was exposed by the PCIJ. In 2000, the Center published a series of astounding reports about then President Erap Estrada’s close to P1 billion worth of land and houses in some of Metro Manila’s poshest and most exclusive districts. They are entitled, The State of the President’s Finances: Can Erap Explain his Wealth? (July 24-25), The Estrada’s Three Dozen Houses: First Family’s Firm Flouts the Law (August 21-22) and Estrada’s Fronts: Cronies and Attorneys (October 23).

In the article The State of the President’s Finances (Philippine Center for Investigative Journalism Online. 26 August 2006 ), a table of Estrada’s assets, liabilities and net worth in millions of pesos is presented. The article urged Estrada to explain how he can support his lavish lifestyle. His statement of assets and income tax return does not provide an accurate picture of the magnitude of the President’s and his families’ wealth.

The Estrada’s Three Dozen Houses (Philippine Center for Investigative Journalism Online. 26 August 2006 ) revealed how the JELP Real Estate Development Corp., a company owned by the Estrada family which built 36 two-storey townhouses on a one-hectare lot in Antipolo, committed eight (8) major licensing violations according to Housing and Land Use Regulatory Board (HLURB) Licensing Division’s Technical Services Assistant Chief Magdalena Vergara. Among JELP’s basic offenses were not securing zoning and building permits, environmental clearance certificate and the license to sell.

The article Estrada’s Fronts: Cronies and Attorneys (Philippine Center for Investigative Journalism Online. 26 August 2006 ) has a table entitled Houses Fit for a President? which shows properties owned by President Estrada citing house and lot addresses, lot sizes in square meters, estimated market values, construction costs based on estimates by various builders and purchase dates. It was concluded by stating the profiles of Estrada’s front men, real estate developer Jose Luis Yulo, businessman Jacinto Ng, and Puregold Duty-Free Shops owner Lucio Co.

This series of articles is consistently cited in broadsheet and online publications as the start of the downfall of Estrada’s administration. The top major daily, Philippine Daily Inquirer, was urged to create the Web site Bad Times: Estrada under Siege (http://www.inq7.net/jueteng/) on October, 2000 to gather all published materials about the topic in one site.

The Consequences

As the Center believes that the media should be a catalyst for social debate and consensus by providing the bases for arriving at informed opinions and decisions, it went a step further, shared research techniques and tips on accessing information to its Web viewers. PCIJ equips the citizenry with a channel where they can exchange information and insights through a blog it aptly calls Inside PCIJ. A blog is a Web site that provides a venue for commentaries or news and information about a particular subject (Wikipedia. 26 August 2006
). On April 4, 2005, the Center launched the first institutional blog ever set up by a media organization in the Philippines. (Philippine Center for Investigative Journalism Online. 26 August 2006 ). A total of 17 bloggers posted comments within 3 days after its launch. Bloggers are persons who express themselves via online media (Civilities, Media Structures Research 26 August 2006
). In this Web site, topics are categorized into Charter Change, Access to Information, Arroyo Impeachment, Investigative Reports, Media Issues (including Journalist Killings) and Political Humor, among others.

The most commented topic is Palawan Radio Journalist Killed (Inside PCIJ. 22 May 2006 ). It is about the murder by shooting of hard-hitting radio commentator Fernando Batul of Puerto Princesa, Palawan. No less than 521 comments are posted, the most recent of which were written two (2) months later. Alecks Pabico, PCIJ’s online manager, responsibly closed the post for comments as he judged that all arguments and counter-arguments have all been exhausted… rather than add to the animosity caused by reckless accusations from both sides, which add up to nothing.

No matter how well-researched and documented articles are, people mentioned within them find ways to stop the Center. On November 5, 2005, the Philippine Daily Inquirer posted on its front page Court Orders 'Libelous' Item Deleted from PCIJ Website. The article is about the stand-off between the controversial “Hello, Garci” digital audio engineer Jonathan Tiongco and the PCIJ. The Center received the first legal action and first temporary restraining order (TRO) issued against a blog in the Philippines. In April, 2006, The Center for Media Freedom and Responsibility (Center for Media Freedom Online 26 August 2006 ) reported six (6) additional lawsuits filed by Jonathan Tiongco. Investigations into the case are still ongoing.

We tell it like it is… No matter who… No matter what… Journalism with an Impact

The Philippine Center for Investigative Journalism is able to publish hard-hitting articles because its funding is beholden neither to media owners nor advertisers. The Center is able to maintain its credibility and to hold the interest of the reading and viewing public about an issue because reports cite specific cases together with the complete names of people involved. It also urges the citizenry to be actively involved as it collates and presents pertinent information about offices and organizations that are handling specific cases. Mass media has the power to arouse the interest of the public regarding a topic which may be of national importance yet considered to have little appeal depending on the presentation of the subject matter.

Journalism with an impact means opening the minds of the people to questioning the state of affairs of the nation. The Center even went as far as sharing coverage techniques so the public can be involved in searching for the truth and not passively accepting reports seen on the television, heard on the radio or read in the papers. As a result, the boundaries of the role of the media were pushed to provide the venue where opinions may be exchanged. This should still be responsibly regulated by the owners of the forum, however, so as not to lose sight of the original focus. As new ways of expressing opinions are introduced, some legal boundaries may be tested. These are all consequences of searching for the truth by the inquisitive minds that are presented with fascinating evidences.

Analyzing the Analysis

Analyzing the Analysis

(Book Review on News for Sale:
The Corruption & Commercialization of the Philippine Media 2004 Edition)

News for Sale: The Corruption & Commercialization of the Philippines Media (2004 edition) was written by Chay Florentino-Hofileña to document the psychology of Philippine elections and make the reader understand the interplay between politics and media in these times. In addition, the author aimed to present solutions to the existing situations which happened during the previous election period in the Philippines by involving the government, the media and the voting public.

The public expects media to deliver without bias the news regarding events of national interest especially the coverage of elections. The book documents how things were done in the past to establish that corruption in Philippine media started during the reign of President Ramon Magsaysay. One chapter is dedicated to each of the biggest media forms - television, radio and print. These chapters show that power and fear are the strongest motivations why politicians and media people perform their corruptive acts. The acts of the few good men are also mentioned to show that, provided the media person and the publisher/station manager stood by their convictions, buying media can still be reduced, if not totally eliminated.

Considering the title of the book, it shows what should be expected in the content. The cover which shows a cartoon illustration of how media people are usually depicted, i.e., wearing vests on top of shirts, one of them with a laptop, one with a sling bag holding a microphone, and the other one holding a video camera. They neatly fall in line. It is disturbing to note that a hand is putting money into the tops of their heads, which are opened by them willingly. The first and last persons in the line are partially hidden, giving the illusion that it is the practice, it has gone on for some time and will continue on for who knows when. It is also disheartening to note that no one is making them fall in line, no one resists falling in line and no one is doing anything to stop it.

The Editor’s Note establishes the credibility of the book by telling the measures on how the information presented were collated. It also mentions the goal of the book, to document how corruption is institutionalized during election period. Since this is a revised edition, it gives a brief history of what can be found in the previous edition through a summary, and gradually paced into the revised edition. It is a good teaser on what to expect in the book. It presents the reasons behind the events. It shows how political machineries fed on the need of TV and radio executives, and newspaper editors to gain profit. It also showed how corruption is legitimized in all media forms during elections. Another goal of the book is to educate the public of the laws which should be referred to in the given situations. It shows the public’s responsibilities in strategic places.

Throughout the book, it is apparent that the motivation of the people who do these malpractices is fear, i.e., fear of what politicians can do to media people and fear of what media people can do to candidates’ images. The book gives detailed accounts of events which actually happened, mentions big names in Philippine media and politics. When the source declined to be identified, the book establishes his/her credibility by mentioning the position held or roles played in certain circumstances.

Hofileña employs a consistent form of writing. She gives an overview of what to expect in all subtopics and since I have been reading it critically, it leads me to pose questions. I have consistently found the answers to them. However, Hofileña is fond of using “mental quotes.” At first, it appears witty but since she uses it abundantly, it makes me feel that she has left too many matters for the readers’ inference. The book also quotes political analysts’ insights, though they remain unnamed.

As the topic is corruption, Hofileña mentions the exceptions to the rule, those who did the right things and what happened to them as well. She mentions the faults of press people, how rampant corruption is, with detailed accounts of events in Metro Manila, but that is understandable considering the Philippines’ political set-up. Some accounts were brief glimpses of what have happened which makes me almost want to read the source articles. (If I had the time, maybe I would look for the books mentioned in the End Notes.) Since many statistics come from surveys, the author uses different sources of statistics.

Hofileña also shows the importance of the print and TV station’s management’s support when reporters are pushed against the wall regarding some issues, how Chino Roces, then Manila Times publisher and then young business reporter Satur Ocampo, dealt with a threatening situation and how the daily BusinessWorld deals with it on a consistent basis. Even if reporters stand by their convictions, they are powerless when big people approach the bosses.

Chapter Two is entitled Television Is King. It establishes the reach of television in terms of audience in comparison to other media forms, hence the title. It shows how politicians use TV so they will be remembered best. I agree with the writer that since the reporters, the incumbent and those seeking positions are in constant contact, it sometimes makes it hard when to draw the line between friendships and official matters. This is still not a valid justification in seeing wrong things as acceptable, at the very least. The book humanizes media people in an objective manner.

In the same chapter, I almost wanted to skip the passages where Lolit Solis is cited as the source of information because I doubt her credibility considering the many scandals she gets in to. However, since it covers four pages, I was forced to pore over it. In the end, I was enlightened that she was a good source considering she managed big celebrities such as Lorna Tolentino, Christopher de Leon and Judy Ann Santos, among others, who were endorsers of politicians in election times. It also shows the effects when showbiz and politics mingle, how a taboo practice in political beat reporting such as distribution of envelopes with money is widely accepted in the entertainment world.

Another personality which held my interest was Loren Legarda. Her ways of swaying reporters to her side stood out to me because she used to be part of the media that she tries to buy off. Instead of taking the lead on correcting the wrongdoings, she was a victim as well of the system of bribery in order to secure her place in politics.

The chapter Airwaves for Sale is another striking matter for me. Here, the radio players are the ones who approach politicians so they would buy air time in “bargain and discounted” prices. As all candidates have media strategists, it shows how the appropriate medium grooms the right image for a politician.

The last media form discussed is Paying for Print. It shows that processes and standards in place in a system are the best recourses to fight off corruption as it boils down to consulting the right document when one is in doubt. A Glossary of Media Corruption is documented at the end of the chapter.

On the whole, the book is depressing to read because it presents the harsh realities during elections. The last chapter presents welcome topics as it shows the measures put in place by the media to set as standards and guidelines to curb the wrong processes. The solutions presented are realistic as it calls for the accountability of the government, media and the voting public. Enforcing these measures is the hard part as it goes against the “rules laid out by traditions.”

Learning in Theory and in Practice

I really want to update this blog on a regular basis. However, sometimes, life is boring. As I was racking my brain thinking of things to write about, it hit me that I may post the articles I wrote in class which earned me respectable grades. Here's one...

Learning in Theory and in Practice

Digital technologies provide the fastest means to access and disseminate data that eventually become information and knowledge, depending on an individual’s level of interest and expertise. The geographical location where data resides is no longer an issue because members of social groups and occupational worlds can conveniently share resources anytime anywhere. This does not guarantee, however, that individual members of a group working collectively are easily dispensable as they know how to effectively turn information to knowledge in a particular organizational setup.

Brown & Duguid describe information as independent, thus, more or less self-sufficient. However, unless information, in the form of data, is transformed into knowledge, through the “appropriate application of the appropriate technology for the appropriate situation,” it is completely useless. Thus, knowledge management is possible through the use of “flexible electricity-based technologies that converge all previous media forms into a common form” (McLuhan).

In spite of this, it is still the culture within organizations which mold people into ideal knowers of knowledge. Brown & Duguid mentioned that “in areas where knowledge really counts, people count more than ever” as they know how to work within the culture. In an organizational setup, new workers can be trained on how to work within a system but it takes time to orient and train individuals on how to access the information they need. It takes time to develop good camaraderie among individuals with different personalities that need to collaborate to efficiently exchange knowledge and information. Information technology provides the means for members to communicate indirectly but “changes propagate easily and allows for highly productive and creative work to develop collaboratively, where reciprocity is strong.” This is because knowledge “entails a knower’s understanding and a certain degree of commitment.” In any given situation, a concerned knower who has spent years within an organization can easily recall related events which happened in the past that has bearing on the present situation. This knowledge; can serve as guidelines on formulating effective measures to reach future directions.

For this reason, “blind downsizing by business process reengineering cause organizations to lose ‘collective memory’.” While it is also true that “people learn on their own through picking up information from numerous sources about numerous topics without even becoming a member” as people share little or no common practices in these communities, only a handful of relevant information are accessed. This results in little knowledge, hence, people take little action. In these situations, they can hardly make “a difference that makes a difference” (Bateson).

Positive differences can be easily achieved because geographical location of data is no longer an issue. Digital technologies provide the means to conveniently share resources anytime anywhere. The crucial element that will determine an organization’s failure or success are seasoned individual knowers in a group who work collectively to transform information to knowledge.

More New Friendships

Friendships always excite me. I’m the type of person who takes ages to warm up to people. However, I find myself easily opening up to people in a meaningful way lately.

My friendship with the biology professor I met in the Singles for Christ-Christian Life Program (SFC-CLP) recently is going stronger. She was truly one of God’s blessings from the start. We had dinner in campus once, actually went out on 2 different weekends to do girly things such as malling and shopping and I even kept her company for breakfast this morning. To think I only knew her on July 21.

I recall how excited we always are when they grouped us for sharing in CLP. By the 4^th week, we knew that we would be permanent CLP group mates. I like talking to her because she makes sense and she actually indulges in girl talk. My other friends have already outgrown girl talk. Being with her is always fun.

I have another new friend in campus. Our offices sometimes coordinate on projects once in a while so we know each other by face but never really talked. I only talked to her because my officemates saw her being interviewed on TV. I asked her about it, one question led to another and now I’m actually very open to her about most things I would have kept personal till who knows when?

When there are people with whom I dare to be myself in a matter of days, I sincerely feel most richly blessed.

Proud of my 3.5s

You may say that I am so full of myself today but I am very proud of the grades I got in my 2 Master’s classes!!! Two 3.5s no less!!!

I can say that I pushed myself to the limit because I felt the genuine need to learn. I sincerely wanted to impress both of my professors because they are considered brilliant minds in their professions. I came to classes prepared with answers and most of the times, questions too. I even appreciated the hard work and effort I exerted in both subjects because I actually learned new things. They were the topics which I would have given up reading after the first page, if I didn’t need to pass with decent grades. They used simple English yet the matters discussed were really complicated. I and my classmates actually felt that the school term ended too soon. Just when we mastered the subjects, just when we could discuss most technologies in the lessons discussed, just when all things came into place.

Next term, I imagine all 14 of us students will meet on the first day of class excited to see each other and apprehensive too because both of our professors are well-respected in their fields nationally. Next term, I imagine the camaraderie will pull us through the classes once again as we ask questions we consider hard to answer on our own yet no-brainers to the professor and our other classmates. Next term, I am looking forward to pushing myself to the best of my abilities and who knows, maybe even earn a 4.0 for it?

A Day for Small Notes

A message from a good friend:

hi pres! i hope you always keep that smile in your beautiful face and kind heart. keep it up my dear.

In continuation of my last post, here aretext messages regarding my application:

• Cousin, dumaan bos ni digs dto. Malaki chances mo. Sabi ok daw yung babae na taga dlsu. Pero may gusto iba yung vp. D magaling. Ayaw ng panel. Galingan mo next wk.ü
• Ntapos pa lng i-chk parts 1 & 2 nung exam. Mganda, ksi nkita ko highest ka. D pa nga lng kasama stories na pnasulat sa inyo. 3 aplicants daw 2 com tom.
• Mukhng type ka nung 2 evaluatr di2. Pero syempre quiet ako para d halata. Le’ts pray stil.

Postscripts to my last post:

In my growing up years, I only ever saw my dad’s relatives during the summer mostly because we live so far apart. With some of my cousins who are in the same age group as I am, I can be my natural self. I mean, I don’t have to walk on eggs and be extra nice because we all ran after each other in the gardens together, bathe in the “kubota” (rice field irrigation source), slept on swings or the house “silong.”

As I wanted to check if sickness was in my parents’ genes specifically my father, I informed one of my cousins. It was also my introduction in telling them gently to take good care of themselves without unduly alarming them. Needless to say, she told our relatives about my health. Last night, two of my dad’s sisters called me up asking how I am. They are genuinely concerned. They reassured me several times that I am always included in their prayers.

Thinking Out Loud

Some of my friends say that I always see the silver lining in most situations. In my point of view, as the cliché goes, it’s all a matter of perspective. The glass is either half-empty or half-full. Personally, it’s a matter of choice. I choose to magnify the good things in life while resolving the small issues. For example, I know my brain is not working at optimum level, yet I cannot complain because I comprehend lessons in Master’s classes well and I still have a sunny disposition. It actually takes little to make me happy.

My cousin told me about a job opening in a top-earning government office. The first time I knew about it earlier this year, I immediately submitted my credentials. Needless to say, I wasn’t able to get in the first time. An office insider told me that I was actually considered till the very last step but the office chose the internal applicant. I just shrugged it off because I still like working in my present office.

For some reason, the person chosen for the said position declined the job offer. As a result, the office once again posted the job opening. Again, I applied for it by submitting the same set of credentials but this time, I did it half-heartedly only. Mainly because I heard that it was a position co-terminus with the head of the agency. If course I want a permanent position with plantilla. However, this time, I was invited to take the written examination and job interview.

The written exam was divided into five parts, spelling, plural form of nouns, formulating the slogan from a short paragraph, formulating an advertising copy from a technical article, and business report writing. I suddenly remembered why I resigned from business report writing. It takes too much comprehension and analytical skills that at the end of the day, I am physically exhausted that my head literally aches.

During the exam, the office big boss acted like a hostess who felt that we needed to be entertained WHILE taking the exam. She told us some office concerns and surprisingly, she even informed us that her senior staff members conducted the interviews and she just approved of their recommendations.

The following day, the same office insider who informed me of the job opening again told me that I was being considered seriously for the position by the senior staff members who would conduct the interviews. However, their big boss has another preference.

Considering the perks of the position, I am actually thinking seriously about getting in that office. I originally applied for the job because I didn’t want my cousin to think I was ungrateful she informed me of the opening. Now that I know the perks offered by the position, I really want to get that job. I need the financial security it will offer because I have to earn well while I can considering my health.

I’ll just follow what another cliché goes, “Do your best and God will do the rest.”

Going Through the Classic Student Stages

To say that I had a hectic week is surely an understatement! We had to present our group project as a class requirement. All of us 3 group mates are working so we went through all the classic stages, i.e., the never ending conflicts in schedule, the group mate who needs the adrenaline rush brought on by last SECOND revisions, the personality clashes, you name it, we went through it.

Good camaraderie really works wonders for me. As I an very comfortable with all of my classmates, I was worried not because I had to present in class but because I felt that our product needs to be thought out and developed further. As they say, “All’s well that ends well.”

I’m going through another classic stage. After that one demanding subject, I am relaxing though I still have an equally demanding subject with a deadline next week. I just miss clicking the TV remote control for 30 minutes nonstop looking for a program I’ll be interested, in sleeping in my bed for at least 7 hours, basically just being carefree.

Still, after all that’s said and done, the masochist in me screams that I have accomplished something, the hard work was worth it and I wouldn’t mind going through it all over again.

Things I Never Knew I Never Knew

My officemate who is taking up MS Info Tech asked the activities we do in MA classes. I told him that in fulfillment of my class requirements, I got to interview a great writer (Pablo S. Gomez), I attended the Urian Awards night, I watched 3 movies and read a great book, among others. As I was recounting these things to him, I was smiling from ear to ear.

He asked me if we didn’t have writing requirements at all. I told him that on the average, we read 150-200 pages a week in order to write a 2-page double-spaced reaction paper in 12 points Times New Roman. I told him that we were also asked to read a whole book in a week’s time and write a review about it. I told him I seldom go out with my friends because I simply don’t have the time.

With his eyebrows joining in a frown, he said he couldn’t understand why he senses genuine joy when I recounted the class activities. That it because, in all honesty, I really enjoy what I’m doing. All my habits are “legitimized” by school requirements, e.g., watching movies and reading books. Getting decent grades for it is just the icing on the cake.

I really like the knowledge I gain in the classes. I love learning about the interplay of communication, culture and technology, looking at technology through sociologists’ eyes, the events in history that shape mass media particularly movie themes, among others. I also like critiquing published books. It makes me feel that I am learning to question printed materials, that had I read at the start of the year, would have accepted as unquestionable facts. My opinions are suddenly validated by my professor, my classmates who are from related but different fields too.

This is my first trimester in Master’s class. I’m 2 weeks away from finishing 2 subjects. With the little knowledge I have gained so far, I honestly feel that I have learned a lot and there are a lot more interesting topics that I will get to know. I’m truly excited to know more things I never knew I never knew.

Reality Bites & Coming Clean

I attended the 2006 Urian Awards last Thursday. My prof gave us admission tickets. I sat behind Eddie Garcia (Urian Lifetime Achievement Awardee) and in front of Robin Padilla (Best Actor) who was with Regine Velasquez that night.

Moving on to Friday... This was one day which had its fair share of ups and downs. I was on leave from the office because of my scheduled neuroscan exam in the afternoon. As instructed, I didn’t take my medicine. I was there in the hospital on time but my neurologist was an hour late which actually turned out to be a blessing.

The test itself took around 20 minutes. My limp returned but not as worse as before the healing mass. After that, he confirmed his initial diagnosis. I have a rare disease that they don’t know much about yet. Needless to say, this brought me down. I was disappointed. The sickness is so rare he got my blood sample, took a video of my movements and made me sign a waiver that said I have no claim whatsoever to the results of the exam. He’ll use it for further research on the disease. He also asked if I could get my cousin to give her blood sample too because she has a related disease.

I mentioned that his lateness was a blessing mainly because I had to rush to the campus to attend the 5:30 pm mass. This gave me no time to think and dwell on his prognosis. I was still late for the mass. After that was the scheduled SFC-CLP. While waiting for it to start, I read my notes for class the next day. I was lined up by my officemate to share the miracle of the healing mass I attended. Due to my disappointment, I begged off. She understood my situation.

I have a new good friend, thanks to the CLP. She’s a professor. We actually hit it off from the first session till now. Since I was surrounded by people and I was listening to the sharing in the CLP, I postponed thinking about my health. I even told all the people present there to watch the Urian that will be aired that night.

When I got home, I watched the Urian on TV. Thoughts about the diagnosis entered my mind but I was successful in putting it off till after the program. Then I had no reason to postpone thinking about it any longer. I honestly can’t remember the thoughts which entered my mind then but I can recall the acute sadness I felt that night.

Before I went to sleep, the miraculous things which happened to me the past few days dawned on me:
1. I was able to attend the healing mass and walked as normal as I can for 3 days.
2. I was able to consult with the country's top movement disorder specialist.
3. All my medical-related expenses were cut dramatically.
4. I heard all the right encouragements to get me through this series of events with a positive outlook.

I slept feeling a bit better. I thought, maybe, I have this sickness so I may contribute to further study about it. Call it philosophizing but I felt I was serving a higher purpose. I got to sleep feeling a bit better.

COMING CLEAN

Today is Monday. I told 4 more people about my sickness. This is a real record-breaker for me. I usually keep these kinds of matters to myself. I don’t even answer direct questions about my limp. Talking about it over and over again throughout the day served as my catharsis. After the last person I told, I was so fed up with my medical history I just wanted to just get on with my life as usual.

An Angel Wrapped in a Different Package

It seems that angels just keep on making their presence felt most especially in this trying time of my life.

My present neurologist told me that the test he would like to make me go through costs a considerable amount. It popped into my mind that I could course it through the health care provider. The thing is, I had to go back to the first neurologist I consulted. He wasn’t really bad. He just didn’t like explaining things which were happening to me. In short, he was a snob.

As expected, the first thing he asked me was why I never returned to him when he specifically told me to consult with him monthly. I decided to come clean at once. I told him I sought 2nd and 3rd opinions and that they had similar diagnosis. He didn’t miss the chance to point it out to me. Good thing I was in a light mood and just grinned and bore.

He told me that the health care provider might not be able to finance the exam I should go through because it was too expensive. He gave me a recommendation anyway. Guess what? My payable was reduced to a mere 13% of the total amount. In short, my snob neurologist turned out to be ANGEL NUMBER 1 of the day.

I went to my neurologist during office hours. I told my supervisor all my health concerns. He was very supportive. He allowed me to go. I planned to be out for 4 hours at most. However, because of the long lines, I was able to go back to the office after 5 hours. Because I felt that I reported for less than the 4 hours required for my attendance to be considered half-day at least, I just filed for an unscheduled vacation leave for the day. My supervisor told me that we should consult it with our office director. They were both very understanding, ANGELS NUMBER 2 and 3. Don’t get me wrong, these 2 people are angels in all aspects.

Life is always good. God is always good. Blessings are everywhere. We just need to be receptive to the blessings that come our way. Just because we don’t like the packaging, doesn’t mean it will not work itself out for the best.

Me and My Angels

When it rains it pours. Sure, I have my own share of problems nowadays but God made it up to me yesterday by giving me blessings even before I asked for them. Since all the friends I have now have passed my criteria for friendship, they were elevated a notch higher yesterday. Hence, they were transformed as my personal angels.

ANGEL NUMBER 1is literally an angel. She is barely three months old. Her parents were worried about her because she had seizures a few days ago. This baby angel’s grandma heard in a mass that a priest would officiate a healing mass the following day. This baby’s aunt, my officemate, remembered me and called me up at once.

Hence, ANGEL NUMBER 2 is my officemate. My officemate reminded me that since it would be a healing mass, the only thing I can hold on to, should I attend it, is my strong faith.. I attended it, partially because I thought that my sickness has no cure and faith is all I can hold on to.

ANGEL NUMBER 3 is a Filipino priest. He is known the world over as an instrument of Christ through his healing masses. He emphasized over and over again that it is the faith of the people that heals them and he is just a vessel.

Many miracles were performed through him on that day. Believe me when I say that more than 10 people who got around with assistance and in wheelchairs were able to walk unaided after the priest touched them. Just witnessing those were enough to make anybody feel God’s warm and loving presence.

Though the crowd gathered around him, I was able to tell him about my limp and he simply told me, it would go away. Lo and behold! My walk improved significantly immediately after. My limp was almost gone as I was on my way home. I was even bold enough to skip my scheduled medicine intake.

I was scheduled to consult a different neurologist that day. As I assessed I was completely healed, I cancelled my appointment with him. I told ANGEL NUMBER 4, another friend, about everything. She wisely told me to go to my doctor’s appointment. Thank God, I followed her advice. However, I should back out a little, before I continue with this story.

At the beginning, when no doctors who could identify my sickness, I searched for a Filipino neurologist and I saw one US-based who has cured disorders like mine. I e-mailed him and told him about my limp. He replied after more than a month and told me that he would come to the Philippines. He also informed me that I might like to attend a support group session with members composing of people like me. (I later found out that he was the founder of the support group meeting I attended.)

So I attended the session and set up a consultation schedule with ANGEL NUMBER 5, my neurologist. The appointment was set on the afternoon of the healing mass. This neurologist advocated the Robin Hood mentality though with a modern twist. He determines his consultation fee according to the financial capacity of the patient. He was very thorough in his tests. All in all, the way he performed his tests and the way he talked about the support group, I felt that he was genuinely happy in helping the people who come to him and he is deeply concerned with all the people he was attending to.

When I went home, I called up my closest friends, my FLOCK OF ANGELS, to tell them the best news about me in a long time. I was surprised to find out that they were all praying hard for my well-being. They prayed for me silently because they didn’t want me to worry much about my condition. Needless to say, my heart was revitalized. I cannot recall the number of times I cried on July 31, 2006. It was a truly magically blessed day.

SMS Friendship

Personally, I think the second greatest invention of all time is the cell phone. (This is next to the computer, of course). Nowadays, being updated on what’s happening to a friend in distant shores is as simple as sending an instant text message that will be received in real time. Text messages brought me closer to friends. Across the miles, SMS are creative ways of saying hi, instrumental in bringing the essence of good news that would have taken a long time were it discussed via a landline phone, and patching things up with friends after a heated discussion. (These are what I can recall from the top of my head).

There are times when a friend and I, who resides abroad, have heated arguments through SMS. Usually, we just let each other cool down and communicate when we have better dispositions. This can take as short as one day or as long as three months, depending on the issues we disagreed on. However, lately, the pattern has grown old, at least for me. We’ve fallen into this situation countless times. There are instances when we argue about the same issue over and over again. The new aspect of the arguments is the different characters involved.

Some say we don’t see eye-to-eye on most topics because that person has low EQ (emotional quotient). It actually makes sense. I sometimes find it hard to explain the most basic concepts of friendship to that person. The effort to keep the friendship is there, at least on his part. He tries his best for us to reconcile but I have given up on the thought that we will have a mature friendship with the passing of time. Come to think of it, we never really got along well even when we were in the same country. I sincerely feel that mere SMS can’t repair our damaged friendship.

My Latest "Advocacy"

I attended the Singles for Christ Christian Life Program (SFC CLP) last Friday. Usually, attendees stay after the session to interact with each other. Since I was in Cinemalaya the day before, I couldn’t help but share my latest “advocacy” to support Philippine digital cinema.

I told them to try seeing Philippine digital cinema films because I personally saw their quality. I suppose there will always be films of poorer quality but because they have already been selected from a pool of choices, they are few and far between. On the whole, the event was very organized. Even Laurice Guillen commented that this is even better than the first Cinemalaya held last year.

This is not my first time to “support an advocacy.” In the past, I was obsessed with the environment because of all the flooding in Metro Manila every time heavy rains occur. Then I attended a forum about the sorry state of Philippine tourism. I personally became a “local tourist” with my friends who enjoyed the outdoors as well.

After a while, my friend and I enjoyed watching stage plays especially when Lea Salonga acted in the lead role. To say that I watched stage plays weekly was not an exaggeration then. Now, it’s Philippine independent digital cinema. I honestly don’t know how long I will have this advocacy. All I know is, more independent filmmakers continue to produce good movies and since me and my friends are movie buffs, this is a chance to enjoy seeing movies while supporting a worthwhile cause.

The 2nd Cinemalaya: Philippine Independent Film Festival 2006

Cinemalaya was established to “discover, encourage and honor the cinematic works of Filipino filmmakers that boldly articulate and freely interpret the Filipino experience with fresh insight and artistic integrity, and to invigorate the Philippine film industry by developing a new breed of Filipino filmmakers.” For these reasons, Cinemalaya also has a Congress which explores the various issues and aspects of independent filmmaking by looking back to its past to serve as guidelines in mapping out directions into the future. This year, the Congress is entitled, Back to the Future: The State and Prospects of the Independent Film.

Cinemalaya Congress Director Nicanor G. Tiongson’s Opening Remarks kept up with the theme. He mentioned the resolution formulated last year and gave an overview of what to expect in this year’s discussions. This was helpful to me because this is my first time to attend the Congress. I read the flier about Cinemalaya which was a good teaser but his speech captured the essence of Cinemalaya well. Keynote Speaker Roger Garcia’s speech was about the rationale behind the various international film festivals. He mentioned Asian cinema trends, landmark Philippine films which were acclaimed internationally and the importance of the retrospective perspective in evaluating history in order to come up with systematic ways on how Asian, or Philippine films for that matter, can break into global markets better. His lively speech was humorous and witty.

The scheduled congresses for the day followed and it was kicked off by the panel on Tales of the Auteurs: The State of Independence. The three (3) panelists were Director Yam Laranas, Director Briccio Santos and Screenwriter Armando Lao. In the open forum, Santos answered the questions well and gave the most feasible solutions to the concerns raised. Lao could improve on his speaking skills but as I went over my notes, I realized that his answers made sense. Laranas, however, was asked several times to explain most of the matters he discussed in his speech. When Director Marilou Diaz-Abaya gave her insights on Laranas’ replies, I suppose some people in the audience saw it as Abaya criticizing Laranas. However, what the audience should remember is that Abaya was speaking from her more than 20 years’ experience in the movie industry, in contrast to Laranas’ ten years.

Still, the highlight of the Cinemalaya is the films shown. I watched Tulad ng Dati, Saan Nagtatago si Happiness and Mudraks. It was apparent in both Saan Nagtatago si Happiness and Mudraks that the filmmakers could have a hard time marketing the movies in the mainstream. In Happiness, the theme of the story is about a middle-aged man looking for his mother. I did not like it much because it left several matters unsettled. For example Darling Lavinia was talking to Andy Bais about leaving the place while pulling a bag of belongings. The scene was interrupted by the emergence of Ricky Davao with a knife wound. The story ended without providing the answers to the questions, Was Darling Lavinia able to leave the place? and Did Ricky Davao survive? On the other hand, Mudraks showed the importance of both individuals’ background in compatibility as lifetime partners. It was apparent in the movie that the script was well-written.

Of the three, I had a hard time justifying why Tulad ng Dati could not be shown in the mainstream. The answer came to me days afterwards. The plot was about The Dawn, a famous rock band in the 80s. Hence, it catered to a certain age group, probably between 30 and 45, who enjoy band music which could mean a small targeted audience bringing in low profits, if any at all, should it be shown in the mainstream.

Mainstream media presents formulaic films to ensure profit. In the process, filmmakers who want to try other kinds of stories and presentations organized themselves to have a venue where they could show their creativity. Cinemalaya was established to “discover, encourage and honor the cinematic works of Filipino filmmakers, and to invigorate the Philippine film industry by developing a new breed of Filipino filmmakers.” The new breed of Philippine independent filmmakers showed that given the chance, they can produce quality films as well. However, they need to have a dialogue with the veterans in the industry so that they will know what works and what doesn’t work in Philippine filmmaking. The veterans can impart their insights gained through years of experience while the newbies can share their concerns and industry experiences as well. The veterans’ years of experience can serve as guidelines in mapping out directions for a better future for Philippine cinema.

Technology and its Effects

This is a paper I wrote in one of my classes.

Recombinant Architecture

When I searched the Internet for the definition of recombinant, the top results were from the medical field. The Web site www.antigenics.com defines recombinant as “a process involved in genetic recombination that gives rise to offspring that have combinations of genes different from those of either parent.” This is the very essence of recombinant architecture in the information technology field where most physical structures have been replaced by bits and bytes, e.g., from bookstores to bitstores, from stacks to servers, from work to net-work, from home to @home, among others. These shifts arose from the need to accommodate more information and to establish connections regardless of time and space.

McLuhan’s global village where “technology gradually creates a totally new human environment” ingeniously captures this phenomenon. As long as a computer is hooked up to the Internet, we can let our fingers “[cursors] do the walking” (Yellow Pages). Technology also helps maximize physical spaces as “all that is solid melts into air” and as the “world turns into an electronic stage,” said William Mitchell in Recombinant Architecture.

A good example of this is how bookstores have dedicated store spaces for bitstores. Digitized information accessible online and those in compact disks (CDs) have replaced printed books. For retailers, this means reduced shelf spaces, for customers, this provides access to a much wider selection. This is also true for university libraries which are accessible outside campus through professor/student accounts. When one needs copies of voluminous information, downloading chapters has become fast and easy. As Mitchell said, “being online may soon become a more important mark of community membership than being in residence.”

This is the same reasoning for the establishment of Globex as claimed by the Chicago Mercantile Exchange Chairman, “[This is a way] to extend our market around the globe across borders and time zones.” Thus, work has shifted to net-work. Employees of a wired business establishment “almost never have to visit the home office.” At present, “business arrangements [that] demand good computing and telecommunications environments rather than large, permanent home offices.”

Even our homes now evolve to accommodate these changes. In the words of W. Mitchell, “[B]ox-busting house plans now bids to become the most powerful organizer of domestic spaces and activities.” This is in compliance with Vitruvius’ principle of architectural decorum which he wrote around 1 BC, “appropriateness of form to purpose and status.”

Outside of the field of architecture, the same principle holds true to this date. More information is accessible online, thus, it is more convenient to have online memberships than to be physically present to talk with colleagues. As a result, face-to-face interactions have been greatly reduced due to good computing and telecommunications environments. “The new technology is diminishing the role for human participants” as observed by financial market players. Shopping which used to be the “chance to mingle with fellow citizens” occurs less frequently and is actually a thing of the past to a good number of “wired” people as information has been digitized.

The proliferation of digitized information arose from the need to accommodate more information. In the process, recombinant architecture came into play and enabled the shift to bits and bytes replacing physical structures. We now “see offspring that have combinations of genes different from those of either parent.” Bookstores have turned into bitstores, stacks have been replaced by servers, work has evolved into net-work, being at home can now fittingly be referred to as being @home. We have truly established connections regardless of time and space.

Chatting with Friends

One of the things I don’t have time for is chatting with friends because as I mentioned in my previous posts, I am very busy. I don’t mean the impersonal chatting through YM, MSN Messenger or AOL Messenger. I’m referring to phone chatting.

I remember the time I could talk for 2 hours on the phone at one sitting. (Yes, this is short compared to my 4 hour phone calls back in high school.) I just want to update my friends on my activities and know the things my friends are busy with.

For me, talking to a friend on the phone is very relaxing and enjoyable. They provide new perceptive on things I cannot understand. They tell me to act my age when I overreact to certain people and issues. They make me laugh with them, and most of the times, at myself too.

Reminiscing is definitely part of most of our conversations. But, as life has taught me, looking back is always good because it gives me perspective on how I was before, how I am now and a little glimpse of how I may act/react in the future.

So now, this is what I do with the rare free time I have, chat with friends and update my blog.

Another Regular Activity for Me

On top of graduate school, I took on another regular activity. I joined Singles for Christ (SFC) Archers, as its flash banner said, GodStruck 2!

I should have been part of the first batch last year but I couldn’t because I had a very active social life back then. I even had an argument with my friend who was doing her best to convince me to join SFC. I never really liked doing things I don’t wanna do :)

During that time, I actually chose who to join among my friends, after office. Back then, I had to learn to turn down gimmick invites so I could have complete sleep and just laze around the house even for just a day. That lifestyle of mine lasted for almost a year. After that, I felt that I was so drained of energy, I turned down all gimmicks altogether.

After a while, with no regular after office activity, I looked back on the things I put off. I suddenly remembered that I could join SFC. So I inquired with my friend about it. She told me I’d be among the first to know when it resumes. I waited, then graduate school came. This took care of all of my so-called free time.

Call it perfect timing! My friend informed me that SFC was starting soon. I wanted to back out once again but felt that I couldn’t do it to my friend again. I talked to my other friends about it and was surprised to find out that two stopped attending after the second session. That aroused my curiosity and decided to attend the first two sessions, at least. Besides, I had a feeling that if I don’t join now, I wouldn’t be able to join ever.

So I attended the orientation last Friday, July 15. Based on the topic discussed, I could hazard an accurate guess on the reason one of my friends didn’t push through with it.

As for me, I was overwhelmed by the personality of the people who were full-pledged members already. Don’t get me wrong because I really felt that they were genuine and sincere but I wouldn’t have been surprised had they grown wings and gotten halos with golden auras! No kidding! They were such sweet people, to say the least.

When I was still talking myself into joining it, I thought the only way I can actually finish is to take it one session at a time. Since I have already started it, I also might as well finish. Maybe I wouldn’t be as ideal a person as they are but I hope some of their goodness rubs off on me eventually.

I'm Back in School

I can’t believe I have free time in my hands now. So, I’ll just update you with what I’m busy with.

Towards the end of summer, I was actually excited to go back to school. Presently, I am taking up MA in Communication major in Applied Media Studies at the De La Salle University. Why I enrolled is another story. :)

At the start, I was awed by the names of the professors when I got to know them! One was a Fulbright scholar with postgraduate degrees earned at the Stanford University and Columbia University’s Teachers College, and the other one is hailed as one of the greatest Filipino writers now!

To say that it was the start of a hectic academic life is an understatement! In both subjects, the first question was “What is the thesis statement?” Now, 10 weeks into the first trimester, I have lost track of how many times I have heard it. One subject required reading 150-200 pages a week to come up with a reaction paper 2 pages long, double spaced 12 points Times New Roman. Now, the names McLuhan, Adorno, Horkheimer, Marcuse, Kellner, Mattleart, among others, march in my mind in my sleep.

In spite of this, I can honestly say that I am enjoying being a working student. One reason is the class is small, just 15 students. They area all OK. Nobody minds if some of the questions we ask are no-brainers, mainly because we are graduates of different degrees. What one may have studied in the past may be a completely new thing to another.

One challenge I face is organizing a group meeting for just three people. Since all of us are working and our offices are far from each other’s we learned to set our priorities straight so we can work on a requirement, our beloved final project.

Overall, the first trimester of graduate school is fun, challenging, exciting, sometimes humiliating, and rewarding, but definitely worth all the effort and time.

An Interview with Pablo S. Gomez

Have I neglected posting here :) I'm currently very busy with graduate school. I have weekly deadlines that take up all my time... Anyway, here's an interview I did with Pablo S. Gomez in compliance with a class requirement.

Pablo S. Gomez is considered as one of the greatest comics writers in the Philippines. His career started in the Golden Age of Philippine Comics. According to an Internet article, he is also the most prolific Filipino comics writer of all times having written more than 200 comics novels, the record once held by Mars Ravelo (Source: http://pilipinokomiks.blogspot.com/2005/12/pablo-s-gomez-komiks-writer.html). His works include Agila ng Maynila, Petrang Kabayo, Machete and Kampanerang Kuba, among others. (Source: http://poll.imdb.com/name/nm1045417/). He is fondly called Mang Pabling in the entertainment industry.

Precious Anne (PALT): Kelan po kayo nagsimula magsulat?

Pablo S. Gomez (PSG): 1950… commercial writing.

PALT: May idol po ba kayo nun?

PSG: During that time ang idol ko nun si Mars Ravelo at saka tatay ni Doy, si Clodualdo del Mundo.

PSG: Si Clodualdo del Mundo ang sumulat ng Prinsipe Amante. Actually, I was in high school 1949, graduating ako 1950 sa Jose Abad Santos High School. Naging guest namin si Clodualdo del Mundo. When he talked, sabi ko sa sarili ko, one day, I will be like him.

PALT: Bakit po kayo na-inspire sa father ni Doc Doy?

PSG: I really wanted to be a writer. So when I was already graduating in high school, sumulat ako sa Roces Publication, sa Tagalog Classics. Nung mabasa nila yong letter, binigyan ako ng sample ng script. Pag-aralan ko daw. The next day, I was there with the script already. After one week, tinawagan nila ako, they asked me if I wanted to work with them. Kaya fourth year high school ako, nagtatrabaho na ako sa kanila. Ang kasama ko nun si Clodualdo del Mundo, editor sya.

PALT: Sa bahay po ba in-encourage kayong magsulat?

PSG: Ayaw ng father ko. Wala daw yumayaman sa pagsusulat. Pero hindi naman ako nagtatago sa father ko pag nagsusulat ako. Deep inside alam kong gusto din nya. But ironically, yumaman ako. Pero yong mother ko ok sa kanya. I was able to give her everything before she passed on.

PALT: Paano po kayo nagsisimula magsulat?

PSG: If you want to be a writer, kailangan tsismoso ka. Kailangan paglakad mo, open ang ears mo naririnig mo lahat. Ang mata mo malikot nakikita mo lahat. Tapos ang mga napakinggan mo, paghahalu-haluin mo yon.

PALT: Ano po ang pagkakaiba ng pagsulat noon sa pagsulat ngayon?

PSG: I’ve been telling young writers na to have a good story. there should be a part of yesterday, a part of today and a part of tomorrow. Ngayon ang kinukuha nilang writers, puro bata. Ang alam lang nila yong today. They do not know what happened yesterday. Kaya iba ang story, iba ang takbo.

Kaya dapat makipag-usap sa mga matatanda. Kasi ang mga matatanda, masasabi nila ano ba ang uso noon, ano ba ang kaibahan sa ngayon. Bukas, anong ie-expect mo? Kaya dapat, pag may nagsusulat ngayon, pagtutulungan ng bata at matanda.

PALT: Naka-vintage typewriter pa rin po kayo hanggang ngayon.

PSG: Oo kasi I’ve been using it for 50 years now. Dalawa pa nga o. Everyday, ginagamit ko. So nung nauso na yong computer, nag-aral naman ako. Primero yong electronic typewriter. May nagregalo sa akin, mga kapatid ko. Hindi ako masiyahan dahil silent at dapat dahan-dahan, kaya pinamigay ko. So after ilang years, nauso ang computer, nag-aral din ako. After namang kumuha ako ng course dun, hindi ako matuto, yon bang basic lang. I don’t feel comfortable doing it dahil tahimik din. Ang hinahanap ko ang ingay ng makinilya at ang lakas ng power ng kamay ko kasi for 50 years nga, yon ang ginagamit ko. So nung nauso ang computer, ang ginawa ko, minamakinilya ko, tapos pinako-computer ko na lang.

PALT: Para po may file kayo?

PSG: Hindi para pag dinala ko sa publication, kasi pag may mga nagpapagawa, pinagtatawanan ako. Kasi kako at my age, sandali na lang ako magsusulat, siguro naman hindi na ako kailangan pang mag-aral ng computer. Kasi at home talaga ako sa lumang makinilya. Ang stories ko lumalabas pag ito ang ginagamit ko. Music to my ears ang ingay nya.

PALT: Nag-establish po kayo ng publishing house.

PSG: Kasi, when you become a writer, during that time, 1950s, golden era ng komiks nun, talagang komiks ang bumubuhay sa lahat. Pag naging successful writer ka, ang first thing na papasok sa isip mo is magtatayo din ako ng publication. That’s what I did. So I put up PSG Publishing House, nilabas ko yong United Komiks. Saan mo nakita yan?

PALT: Nakita ko po sa Internet.

PSG: Nakalagay ba sa Internet yan? Hindi kasi ako marunong mag-internet.

PALT: Wala po kayong e-mail?

PSG: Ginawan yata ako ng apo ko. cheeseroll yata ang e-mail ko. Wala akong kahilig-hilig dyan sa internet. Siguro these are modern ways. Siguro pag talagang matanda ka na, nagsa-shy away ka na sa modern ways. Dun ka na lang sa tabi, nakatingin ka na lang. I don’t want to learn anymore. Pagod na ako ng katatrabaho. Ibigay na yan sa mga kabataan. Siguro I’ll just look.

PALT: Ni-research ko po kayo sa internet. Kayo po ang nag-mentor kay Alex Niño.

PSG: Yeah, I was the one who gave the break to Alex Niño. Ayaw tanggapin ng mga illustrators yan. Kasi daw masyadong modern but when I saw his work, kinuha ko sya. I gave him a chance. Then he became famous, naging number 1 sya. Ngayon sa Amerika number 1 sya. Sinasabi nya sa mga write-up nya, utang daw nya sa akin yong tagumpay nya. Kinikilala nya na ako ang nagbigay sa kanya ng break.

(Alex Niño is a successful Filipino writer of DC Comics. One of his most famous works is the Tarzan strip.)

The same din with other people na natulungan ko, mga artistang natulungan ko, sina Joseph Estrada, Fernand Poe, Jr., Susan Roces, Dante Rivero, Dindo Fernando.

PALT: Ano pong events sa Philippine history ang nagkaron ng greatest impact sa career nyo?

PSG: Bumagsak ako sa Martial Law. When Martial Law was declared, ang komiks noon, natigil lahat. Marami silang pinahinto. Lahat ng komiks, dadalhin mo sa Crame. They will evaluate it, if you really want to publish or not. So because of that, namatay ang komiks. By the time na bumalik ako sa publication ng mawala na ang Martial Law, bagsak na ang komiks. So I was forced to sell my publication.

PALT: So ano pong ginawa nyo nung bumagsak na ang komiks?

PSG: E di nag-apply na naman ako as a writer sa ibang komiks publications. Matatawa ka nga dahil nung naga-apply ako ang ina-apply-an ko mga dati kong empleyado. Sila ang nakaupo dun, tapos ako ang naga-apply, nakapila ako kasama ko yong ibang writers.

PALT: Ano naman po ang best opportunity sa pagsusulat in contrast sa Martial Law na na-suppress po kayo?

PSG: I was able to prove that I can be a publisher, na naging popular ang mga komiks ko. Then ang Roces Publications kinuha lahat ng empleyado ko, from the guard up to the manager. Ibig sabihin nun well-run ang publications ko. Tapos pinagbili ko ang rights ng 3 komiks ko sa kanila.

PALT: Sa information technology at sa nursing, may tinatawag po silang brain drain. Naga-abroad po sila.

PSG: Oo. In fact, I was already offered to work in Hollywood in 1957 sa isang TV show doon. Ayoko dahil sikat na ako dito e. I just went there for a tour, then every year nagpupunta na ako dun. Kung gusto ko yon, siguro American citizen na ako. Tumanggi ako. In-interview nila ako sa TV. Tumanggi ako.

PALT: Sabi po kasi dito sa research ko, may oval bed daw po kayong bigay ni Susan Roces. Nakatago daw po dun yong mga sinulat nyong hindi pa nalalabas. Ano pong balak nyo dun?

PSG: Oo. Totoo. Ngayon, binabalikan ko. Tinutuloy-tuloy ko pagsulat. Binibili ng ABS-CBN. Kelan lang lumabas ang Kampanerang Kuba at Mga Anghel na Walang Langit. Mga old stories ko na yon na naging pera pa ulit. Ngayon yong Komiks every Saturday. Bumili sila sa akin ng 60 stories.

PALT: Sa mga awards nyo po, may favorite po ba kayo?

PSG: Wala. Hindi naman ako mataas na tao. Eton gang mga awards ko, ayoko i-display. Sinabihan lang ako ni Susan Roces na kelan ko daw ba ikakabit yan, pag wala na ako? So ikinabit ko na. Tutal sabi ko, pag wala na ako itatago na ng mga kapatid ko yan. Hinihingi ng UP Museum yan. Ilang beses na ako sinulatan, sabi ko “Teka muna!”

Wala na din kasi ako space. Ang dami ko na ngang sinunog na mga sulat ko kasi wala na akong mapagtaguan.

PALT: Are you in favor of censorship po?

PSG: Nothing wrong kasi ang sine-censor nila yong mga talagang hindi pa dapat makita ng mga bata. Palagay ko, dapat talaga may censorship aside from classification.

PALT: Palagay nyo po, how can the government encourage writers para dumami ang writers natin dito sa Pilipinas?

PSG: They have never done that pa. Dapat magtayo sila ng publication ng komiks, whatever, kasi ang buhay ng tao nasa komiks. Kasi, actually, komiks was number 1 during the 60s hanggang sa 80s. Even the politicians believed in it, even mga taga-probinsya tanungin mo sila they learn Tagalog from komiks. Kaya pag may elections, marami komiks kasi they reach the barrios.

Humina ang komiks kasi unang-una, nagkaroon ng brain drain, yang sinasabi mo. Ang mga top illustrators katulad nina Alex Niño, they are in the States already.

Tapos bukod sa brain drain, nagkaroon ng iba-ibang klase ng entertainment. Merong cable TV, meron ng mga internet. Ang kabataan, dun naloloko ngayon. It’s not the comics anymore. At saka ang mga illustrators natin biglang nawala. Ang mga baguhan ngayon ang drawing na nila mga cartoons, kaya hindi na nabibili ang komiks. Pero I don’t believe mamamatay yan. Mahina ngayon. Siguro given enough time. Kasi part of culture yan.

PALT: Sa mga writers po ngayon, meron po ba kayong nakikitang gusto nyong i-mentor? Bakit po? Dahil po ba wala kayong nakikitaan ng mga passion?

PSG: Wala pa akong nakikitang gusto kong i-mentor. Wala na kasi komiks ngayon, hindi mo makita ang sulat nila. Nasa period tayo ngayon na parang hindi katulad noon na ang writers talagang kalat na kalat.

PALT: Sa palagay nyo po, ano po ang personal characteristics na best assets nyo, na nandyan kayo ngayon, na magaganda mga kwento nyo?

PSG: Siguro talagang in-born yan, na nakatakda ako dun. Siguro talagang naka-linya ako sa ganun. There are so many writers na hindi naman inabot ang inabot ko.

PALT: Ano po ang best achievement nyo as a writer?

PSG: Siguro ang best achievement ko as a writer, marami akong natulungan na nabigyan ko ng pangalan. Ako ang katulong nila sa tagumpay nila.

PALT: So ano po ang advice nyo sa mga aspiring young writers ngayon?

PSG: If you really want to be a writer, huwag mong pilitin just because natutunan mo lang sa eskwela you can be a writer. No! A writer is born. Maaaring matutunan mo lang, ang fundamentals on how to write. Ang dami-daming ngayong mga seminars nagtuturo how to write. Kung ang writing talagang love mo, go ahead because there is money in writing. It is only a matter of gawing kilala ang pangalan mo and you can do that by writing in any form of entertainment, sa radio, television, magazine. Yong nakikita ang pangalan mo. Kasi marami naming gustong sumulat, it’s a matter na magustuhan ng tao.

The Art of Receiving

The ability to be self-sufficient can be very potent to one who has experienced it fairly recently. At least in my case  When the money I earned was enough to consistently finance my needs and small perks every now and then, I slowly started guarding myself from seeking another person’s assistance in most cases, not just financially.

I didn’t know that I was turning into a “mayabang” person. (When I think about it, a shy person and an arrogant person both look like snobs, on the outside. But that’s another story.) I felt that I had to guard my so-called newfound independence fiercely. I tended to shy away from seeking my friends’ help in any way.

My limp taught me a very valuable lesson… the ART OF RECEIVING. At the start, I was annoyed that they kept on asking me what’s wrong with my foot. This is in spite of the fact that they are just concerned about me, i.e., if I felt any pain at all and if I wanted somebody, anybody to accompany me to a doctor.

With the growing number of important lessons life has been teaching me recently, it took me record time to realize that people will not offer anything if they are not sincere. I should be thankful that God has showered me with several well-meaning family and sincere friends who can provide the support I need. Sincere friends who care enough to tactfully tell it to me straight that my limp is getting worse. Well-meaning friends who literally go out of their way to provide assistance to me.

I will never exchange the deep concern in their eyes and the caring tone of their voice when they check up on me. Truly, the best things in life are free.

Me and My Limp

I now recall why I was hesitant to create my blog. I knew that I couldn’t commit myself to update it regularly. Also, I consider myself a very private person who likes to confide to few selected friends the latest things I’ve been doing.

Just for the record, nobody twisted my arm to make me write something personal 

In December, 2005, I felt that my walk changed. My walk suddenly became uneven. I ignored it because I thought it would go away. January of this year, I was actually limping. I continued to ignore it till early March. Then my friends who walked behind me started commenting that I walked differently. They even described it as funny. I was not offended because I could see the genuine concern in their eyes.

I waited to have it checked right before Holy Week, when the doctors I needed also took their long vacations! By this time, I was getting worried. One other reason I wanted to have it checked then was, it was putting a strain on my knee and hip bone. It hurt when I got tired from too much walking.

I was first referred to an orthopedic. He tested my leg’s flexibility (placed it everywhere) and made me walk on tiptoe. He gladly pronounced that as far as his specialization is concerned, nothing’s wrong with me. I didn’t know whether to be glad or sad. Glad because I thought I would undergo cementing procedures. Sad because if my bone is intact (Thank God!) what’ wrong with my gait? He told me that I should have it checked by an acupuncturist or a neurologist!

I opted to have it checked by a neurologist first. The neurologist had more interesting tests. He checked my eyes with a penlight, used a doctor’s hammer on my elbows and knees, and even tickled the bottom of my feet just to test their nerves. He had a very interesting recommendation. He enumerated a list of the things I should do:

1. I shouldn’t tire myself.
2. Stress is a no-no!
3. I shouldn’t take in soft drinks when my bed time nears.
4. I shouldn’t drink coffee!
Talk about test of will power! I cannot function well in the morning and after lunch until I drink my 1 mug of coffee.
5. I should be in bed by 10 p.m.!
This made all my friends laugh. They know that I do not go to bed earlier than 12 m.n. When I do, I expect to be awake around 2 or 3 a.m.

I have been following all these items to the letter for more than a week now. Still, my walk hasn’t improved.

I’m thinking having my foot checked by a manghihilot. My dear Lola, mother and her sisters think this is as simple as being nabati. They said, I’m so fond of going on out-of-town trips. I sincerely hope that this is the case and eventually, my walk will be corrected without medical procedures.

Empowering Desires

I went on a very enlightening retreat in the first week of March. One of my issues was that I felt I had no motivation in the last two years.

I remember a period in my life when I had no free time but didn’t feel tired. This was because I knew what I wanted and how to get it. Everything came so easily for me. There were even times when events favored my circumstances without conscious effort on my part.

In the retreat, I complained that I want to aspire for a goal but can’t see anything worth my time and energy. My wise retreat master told me that it could be because I don’t want to get disappointed at this point in my life. It struck me right at the core.

She gave me three activities that guided me to set worthwhile goals.

1. The power of imagination
   This is simply seeing in my mind how I want the future to look like. It could be as simple as lying down on a blanket in a wide open field with cool breeze all around. I could be there contentedly assessing the circumstances of my life.

2. Listing my goals
   This entails drawing a heart and putting in it a list of all the things that would truly make me happy. I was surprised to find out that the things I really hoped for are not that many and are actually easy to achieve.

3. Envisioning the future
   This requires writing a letter to the person I am most comfortable with dated in the future, preferably around 10 years from now, looking back. In my case, this is my best friend. I told my best friend my status in life by then, the things that kept me busy in that time frame.

After I accomplished all three, I had a new perspective in life. I had a long-term goal and was able to formulate plans on how to achieve them. I discovered the desires that gave me direction, motivated and empowered me.

Ask and You Shall Receive

Below is the homily shared by Fr. Rafael at the PGP Chapel of DLSU in October 6, 2005. The Gospel was Luke 11:5-13. Part of the Gospel was “Ask and you shall receive...” Fr. Rafael writes his homilies in a diary.

There was a time in my life when I could not believe what I just read:

“Ask and you shall receive.”

I prayed fervently but I didn’t get what I asked for. I knocked and I found nothing but a closed door. I was really disappointed and I didn’t want to pray anymore as well as attend masses. Why am I here saying this mass? It is because God didn’t answer my prayers.

If God gave me the beautiful girl I asked to be my wife, I will not be here.

If He gave me the opportunity to continue my engineering course abroad, I will not be here.

If He didn’t allow me to experience many unfortunate events and failures, I will not be here.

This means God knows better than I know what is best for me. Of course, what is best is His plan of providing a shepherd for His flock.

I realized that many of my prayers are selfish prayers. I found out that St. James was right. He said in his letter James 4:2-3:

“You cannot get what you want because you didn’t pray. But even when you do pray, your prayers are not answered because you pray/ask for selfish reasons.”

Then how should I pray? What should I ask for? I will pray a prayer asking and asking, seeking and knocking but let God decide what is best for me and His plans. Jesus says:

“If you who are wicked know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your heavenly Father give good things to those who ask Him?”

So keep on asking and praying. But if the answer is “No”, never be upset. God has another good plan. Don’t hang up, just hang on.

I asked God to take away my habit.
God said no. It is not for Me to take it away
but for you to give it up.

I asked God to grant me patience.
God said no. Patience is a by-product of tribulations
It isn’t granted. It is learned.

I asked God to give me happiness.
God said no. I give you blessings.
Happiness is up to you.

I asked God to spare me pain. God said no.
Suffering and pains draw you closer to Me.

I asked God for all things that I might enjoy life.
God said no. I give you life so you can enjoy all things.